Desiderata
sequel to Carpe Noctem



Ezra was pacing.
Again.
He had been stuck in Vin's apartment for about five days now and though he appreciated the way the others were looking after him, he felt caged in. The first day had been more or less a haze. He had recovered from the attack on him, had fed, had slept, and throughout the evening he had started to feel like his old self again. The next few days he had explored Vin’s apartment. It was quite interesting to browse through the accumulated volumes on history, archeology and geology. Vin had a very extensive collection that came with his trade, as well as a lot of collectibles from various excursions and holidays. Ezra had even browsed through photo albums – after a brief moment of hesitation whether or not to enter this private realm. He had. Smiling to himself, Standish had looked at photos of a young Vin Tanner, then at the shots he had apparently taken when he had joined the team. And of Buck.
So different, he thought. Not at all like the men he had known. It was good so. Otherwise Ezra would have had serious problems by now. Not that he didn’t have serious problems, but they were of a different kind.
Another day had gone by.
And another.
He wanted out! He had a business to run; several businesses, to be precise, and one or two of them required his presence once in a while. That there was a killer after him, someone who had come after him twice before and nearly succeeded, didn't worry him. He knew how to take care of himself. And of Shawn, even if Vin had apparently believed otherwise.

Ezra couldn't but stare at Vin Tanner as the man walked through the door of his apartment, carrying several large bags. All from the same store. The Pet Mart. There was a grin on the youthful features as he dumped half of them onto the table.
"Hey, Ez!"
"Vin." Ezra looked at the bags, mystified. "Uh, what is that?" he inquired carefully.
"Stuff for Shawn."
"Mwwrrrt!"
Hearing her name, Shawn jumped onto the table and sniffed a the bags.
"Yeah. I figured she'd need some stuff since all of hers burned in the fire, too." He pulled a rectangular, plastic container out of the largest bag. "Litter box," he announced.
Ezra couldn't believe it. Shawn sniffed at the dark blue litter box and then looked quizzically at Vin.
"Got the litter as well," Tanner answered the unspoken, feline question.
"Mrow."
"But I also got some playthings."
"Playthings?" Ezra echoed.
"Yep. Fluffy balls, furry mice, feather on a string..." Vin started to take the items out of the bag, all still in plastic wrappings. "A kitty basket, blankets, bowls, and of course the cat food!"
Another bag was emptied and Ezra stared in rising horror at the mountain of premium, canned cat food, as well as kibbles and biscuits, treats and catnip.
"The rest is still in the car."
The last comment floored him completely. "The rest.... Mr. Tanner, did you buy the whole store?"
Vin gave him a bright grin. "Nope. It's just a scratching post."
"A what?" Ezra tried to regain his mental balance. "How long where you planning on keeping me here?!"
"As long as it takes to catch the killer, Ez. And the poor little thing here has nothing at all to play with, or to sleep in. And I don't want her sharpening her claws on my couch."
Vin chuckled as he watched Shawn inspect the paper bag and crawl inside with a happy purring rumble. There was still some of the stuff in side and she rummaged around, pawing at it.
"She loves it."
Ezra cleared his throat. "She really doesn't need all this, Vin..."
A small, black head poked out of the bag. "Mrrrwot!"
Vin raised his eyebrows at Ezra. "Oh?"
"She doesn't have it at home either!" the vampire almost wailed.
"You don't have kitty playthings?" Vin was aghast.
"She's... I mean... Shawn never complained!"
Vin shook his head, frowning. "Poor kitty," he addressed Shawn. "Poor, mistreated little fuzzball."
Ezra was completely speechless, watching his cat - his cat! - receiving consoling pats from Vin, who was mumbling soothingly to her.
"I don't believe it!" He threw up his hands. "You people are not normal!"
"Sayeth the vampire."
He glared at Tanner, who just grinned back.

"Stop pacin', Ez, you're making me dizzy." Vin looked up from the report he was reading in his living room, taking a sip of his coffee.
"I apologize for causing you such an inconvenience, Mr. Tanner. As you are well aware, there is a simple way to end this unpleasant situation."
"You're not leaving." Vin sighed and pushed the report back into its folder. "I am."
"Vin, this is going too far now." Ezra tried it with begging -- more or less. "I don't want to drive you out of your own apartment any longer. I mean, because of me you have to live with Buck, sleep in his... "
Vin waved a hand. "Yeah, yeah, what a hardship. Ezra, you noticed it anyway, so where's the problem? Buck and I have been together for more than four years now. We shared rooms more than once." He shot the vampire a broad grin.
Ezra sighed deeply. "But there is apparently a good reason for the both of you to have your own apartments.”
“Yep, and it has mainly to do with Buck being a chemist, me being a geologist, and both of us loving our jobs. My job is my hobby, as you can see. I love what I do.” he gestured at the displays and samples, “and I love Buck. But Buck keeps some of his work and his for-fun experiments in his fridge. We’d probably be at each other’s throats within a week.” Vin smiled. “This is our solution to that problem and for the last four years, it worked just perfectly. Any other excuses?” he challenged.
Ezra sighed deeply. “Yes. I have work to do, a business to run, the community has to see me every now and then..." He gave Tanner an imploring look.
"Ezra. You. Are. Not. Leaving. That's final! It's far too dangerous. Killer's not been found yet," Vin told him firmly, his expression saying he wouldn't argue about this any more.
"What makes you believe he won't find me here?"
Vin moaned in frustration and rose. "Okay, Mr. Standish, do it your own way. " He stepped toward the front door. "Leave."
With that he opened the door and the warm evening sun streamed into the room. Vin made a flourishing gesture, bowing slightly. The vampire stepped out of the way of the light and glared at Vin, grumbling.
"How nice of you to hold the door open, Vin."
Chris Larabee grinned as he approached the men, holding a huge brown paper bag. At the sight of it, Ezra groaned.
"Please, Mr. Larabee, don't tell me I'm destined to stay in this truly hospitable residence for an even longer time?" he pleaded, almost whining.
"Yep. Another week's ration," Chris answered with a smile.
Ezra rolled his eyes. He watched Larabee walk toward the fridge and put his nourishment into it. Vin couldn't help grinning as he closed the door again and watched the interaction between his two friends. Or the lack of it, that was. Both men were falling for one another, and hard, but they seemed unable to work it out in a foreseeable future. Vin shook his head at that thought. Maybe it was time for Plan B...
 "Buck at home?" Chris asked.
"Uhm-hm."
"Good. Want to talk to you both."
 "Mwrr-RRRT!"
A little black head popped up behind the couch, as Shawn woke up to the man's voice. The small cat belonged to Ezra, and she definitely had a crush on Chris. Actually, she somehow seemed to have adopted the man, because whenever he showed up, she insisted on getting her pats and back-and-belly rubs, and she wouldn't let him leave without it.
"Shawn. How you're doing, little one?"
Chris crouched down as the cat entwined herself demandingly around his ankles, purring and butting her head against his hands in a clear request.
"You like that, do you? Hey, I brought her some heart and liver, that okay?"
"You're spoiling her."
Ezra watched as the man he loved gently stroked the fur of his little companion, scratching her behind the ears where she enjoyed it the most. A small smile appeared on the handsome features, and Ezra had to turn around at the sudden feelings that were rushing through his body. Familiar feelings that seemed to appear every time he even thought of Chris Larabee.
"We're next door, Ezra," he heard Vin announce and simply nodded.
"Good. I'll take a snack meanwhile."
When Shawn saw Ezra walking toward the fridge she stopped cleaning her fur immediately, her eyes following him.
"Mwro- eew?"
"You heard him talk about the liver, hm?"
"Mwrr-ow!"

*

"So, anything?" Vin asked.
"No." Chris shook his head. "Dead ends wherever we turn. There are no useful traces from Ezra's house and no witnesses. JD's still trying to trace the bomb. We have the forensics report, but it's thin. We found one still relatively intact chip. Forensics says it's a common label, one you can buy in every hardware store. It's more or less a sensor. The second chip was beyond recovery. Looks like that one was the trigger."
"Not much," Vin agreed.
"Josiah's working his way through known bombers and arsonists." Chris ran a tired hand through his hair. "I doubt it'll lead us anywhere," he confessed.
"Especially if the bomber was a vampire," Buck interjected. "He won't be on any of our records."
"Yep."
"What's Travis's take on it?"
Another sigh. "Currently he doesn't know whether to pull us off the case, let us work it or assign us back-up. We're not moving anywhere with this."
It was frustrating and Vin knew they were all starting to doubt their own skills. They were good at their job, they knew what they did, but their opponent, the criminal behind the killings, was always either one step ahead of them or cleaning up so perfectly after himself, there wasn't a trace to be found. What traces they had led them nowhere in particular. He himself had driven out to Dead Man's Gulch, inspected the area, had taken soil samples, and Josiah had done a perimeter check. There was nothing to hint at a possible crime scene, but that was no big surprise. Mother nature had taken care of erasing everything.
"So what do we do now?" Buck asked reasonably.
"Hell, I wish I knew," was Chris's answer. "I won't use Ezra as bait again. Too risky. The last time was a close call and I'm not risking him again."
The other two men exchanged meaningful glances.
"What?" Chris snapped, his eyes darkening with anger.
Buck just grinned. "Okay, what are you intentions?"
Chris blinked and stared at him as if he had grown a second head. "My intentions?" he echoed, taken completely by surprise by the sudden change of topic.
"Yep, you heard me. So?"
"What are you? Ezra's dad?"
Vin chuckled. Larabee's glare fell on him and he smirked.
"Hey, we just want to know where this is going, the two of you and all," Buck told him, still smiling.
"First of all, there is no 'two of us'. Second, none of your damn business, Wilmington! Since when have you two become so interested in my life?"
"Your life? Nope. Your love life. Yep, quite interested," Vin quipped.
The glare intensified. "Tanner, you're walking a very fine line here!"
"Looks like yer hit a sore spot there, pard," Buck drawled.
"I don't have any sore spots!" Chris declared.
The smile on Wilmington's face grew. "Oh, but you do. And I know them all," he explained slyly.
Larabee continued to glower at him. "Whatever you are implying, it's wrong!"
Both men shot him a 'we'll see' look.
"You are way too much interested in things that don't exist," Chris growled. "You'd better get your asses into gear and work on the case at hand, find the killer!"
"Well, we are doing our job. Protecting Ezra, keeping an eye on things..." Vin chuckled.
"And if it happens that we can give an old friend some valuable pointers..." Buck went on.
"Buck, shut up!"
"Yep, definitely a sore spot," Tanner commented.
"You, too!"
Chris whirled around and walked toward the connecting door. "I'll check on Ezra, then I'm back to work," he muttered.
"It's already past office hours," Buck remarked innocently.
"Unlike other agents, I do overtime," came the acid remark.
"Ouch, I'm wounded."
Chris simply disappeared through the door and Buck shot Vin a look.
"Man, I knew he was difficult, but right now he's downright impossible! Denial is one thing, but this?" He shook his head.
Vin smiled and walked over to the door, firmly locking it. "Let's give them a while and see what happens."

*

Chris walked back into Vin's apartment and nearly tripped over the small, black cat that sat squarely in front of the door. She made a happy noise and rubbed herself against his shins, tail as crooked as a question mark and quivering.
"Well, hello again. Miss me?" he asked, chuckling.
Shawn meowed again. He rubbed her back and head, then straightened as he felt someone's gaze on him. Before he could say something, the silence was interrupted by the sound of the connecting door closing and someone locking it. Chris grimaced. Ezra, who had been watching him, smiled slightly.
"I guess that means they want privacy?" he asked.
Like hell! Chris thought. They don't want me to come back through that door. But no one had locked the entrance and he was planning on leaving that way the moment he was done here. Ezra couldn't follow him with the sun still not set.
"Probably," he answered, sounding a bit gruff.
"So it's just the three of us?" Ezra went on, voice pleasant, but there was an underlying tone that made Chris's skin tingle.
"No. Only two."
"Even better," came the throaty reply.
"Stop that!" Chris hissed through gritted teeth.
"What?"
"That!" Damn, he couldn't even say it. Chris, you are so pathetic! "Anything you need?" he snapped the question.
Ezra shook his head. "Only what I can't have."
At Chris's scowl, sad green eyes looked at him and he felt his heart miss a beat.
"I want my own life back, Chris," Ezra said softly. "I can't stay here forever."
"Won't be forever. The moment we have the guy, you can go and do whatever you please."
"But how long will that take?"
Chris had no answer for it. He felt sorry for Ezra, but there had been two attempts on his life already and he wouldn't risk losing the man in the third one. He swallowed at the thought, then quickly wiped it from his mind.
Pull yourself together, Larabee!
"Well, I'll be off now."
"No nanny for me tonight?" Ezra asked lightly.
The scowl was back again, but Chris didn't answer. He walked toward the door - only to stop dead in his tracks when Shawn appeared in front of him, hissing at the blond. She arched her back in a clear warning.
"What the.... Shawn!"
She hissed again, a deep rumble underlining the hissing sound.
"Damn, I don't have time to play!"
"To add to your abysmal knowledge of feline behavior.... that is not a cat that wants to play," Ezra said, looking at the black cat with a mystified expression.
"I know that!" Larabee snarled. "What is she doing?"
"She wants you to stay here."
"What?! No way!" Chris attempted to walk around Shawn - and yelped as she swiped at him. "Okay, okay!" he cried.
Stalking over to the connecting door, he banged against it.
No answer.
He banged more.
"Damnit, open up!"
Again, no answer.
"Tanner! Wilmington! Open up that door!"
"Welcome to my prison," Ezra said with a smile.
It earned him a glare, but Chris stopped the banging, slumping against the wall in defeat. He pushed away again after a minute and walked over to the kitchen.
"I need something to drink," he grumbled. "Want something, too?"
Ezra shook his head. "No." He looked like was about to add something, but nothing came.
Chris hesitated the fraction of a second, then asked, "A shake?"
The vampire smiled slightly. The men had adopted the nick for his blood rations after Buck had once called it his 'protein shake'.
"I can get myself one," he offered.
Chris shook his head. He had grown used to it, even Ezra drinking it in front of him, and he sometimes wondered if that didn't make him weird or a freak. Grabbing a can of Coke and the blood container, which looked like a plastic bottle for juice, he walked back into the living room. He tossed the container toward Ezra, who caught it easily. The vampire smiled and sat down on the couch. Chris decided to take the couch chair. He sipped at his soda.
"Okay, what now?" he asked.
Ezra gave him a smile that had him shiver slightly. "I could think of a few things...."
Chris clenched his teeth. "Stop it!" he ordered.
"Like the daily soap marathon," the vampire added smoothly. "I never knew just how many problems one can have until I zapped through the daily collection of talk show and soaps."
Chris shook his head, smiling slightly.
Shawn suddenly jumped onto the couch table, settling down on her haunches. She wrapped her tail around herself, looking very much like an Egyptian statue of a cat.
"Now what?" Chris wanted to know as green eyes gazed at him.
Shawn's stern gaze wandered to Ezra, fixing him with the same intensity, then she looked back at Chris.
"Do I have something invisible on my nose?" Larabee asked.
Ezra chuckled and emptied the blood container. "Not that I can see."
"Very funny."
Chris stared at the cat, which didn't even blink. The tip of the tail flicked once, twice, then the ears did the same. Finally he looked away, Shawn winning the staring contest.
"You can't win," Ezra told him. "She's a cat."
"Tried it before?" Chris asked sarcastically.
"Oh, many times."
Shawn looked back and forth between them, then hopped off the table and onto the arm of Chris's couch chair. She sat down, looked around, then hopped onto the back.
Suddenly Chris yelped loudly.
"What the hell is wrong with her?" Chris exclaimed, rubbing his shoulder where he now sported some puncture marks.
Ezra smiled. "She's probably high on pheromones," he quipped.
"What?"
He sighed. "Pheromones. Shawn has highly sensitive olfactory senses. She smells it, even while it's just a minute concentration around us."
Chris's eyes narrowed. "Us? You mean..."
Ezra shot him a smile. "You and me, yes. In her eyes, we're surrounded by clouds of pheromones. Since they are meant to... stimulate certain behavior... she reacts."
"But..." Chris tried not to think too much about the simple word 'stimulate', but he couldn't stop himself. "She's a cat..."
"Very observant, Chris."
Larabee sunk down on the couch, not even aware that he was now just a few inches away from Ezra.
"A rather remarkable cat."
"That she is. Shawn is a familiar."
Chris frowned. "A familiar?"
"A companion. More intelligent than others of her kind, with a few unique abilities, and much longer living than the average house cat. She was a gift from a witch."
Now the frown turned into a pair of raised eyebrows. "A witch?"
"Is there a echo in here?" Ezra asked lightly.
"You mean... there are witches?"
"Sure."
"And one of them gave you, a vampire, a cat...."
A chuckle. "We're good friends. Actually, Shawn picked me when I paid my friend a visit." He shrugged.
"Witches," Chris murmured. "What else is there? Werewolves? Demons?"
"Oh please!" Ezra snorted. "Demons are a creation of the moving pictures industry, as well as the fantasies of many authors throughout time."
"But werewolves....?" Chris probed carefully.
A smile.
"Oh great!" he groaned. His eyes fell on the small, black cat again. "So she's a bit more than a cat... and she smells... pheromones... Why's she so intent on having me stay here?"
The moment the question was out, Chris could have slapped himself. Of course there was a reason, but would Shawn know? Was she trying to play matchmaker? It was a ridiculous thought!
As ridiculous as witches, vampires and werewolves, the obnoxious voice in his head whispered.
"I think she's fed up with us giving off sexual tension, radiating a scent that tells her that we are more than ready," Ezra suddenly said, pulling his attention solely to the other man. "She thinks it's time to act."
Chris's mouth was suddenly dry. "What sexual tension?" he croaked.
"Look at me, Chris."
It was a whisper. A command. A suggestion. An image of what could be.
No way, something inside him screamed. But he felt himself drawn to the man as he looked inside those deep green eyes. Ezra reached out carefully, not allowing Chris's gaze to go anywhere else. As if he wanted it to!
Something touched his thigh.
It was as if a bolt of pure pleasure ran through his body from that point where Ezra's hand seemed to burn itself through the pants. It made his head swim, and his groin - oh no! No way!
Larabee jumped to his feet, breathing hard and he swallowed a groan as his arousal woke with a vengeance, pushing against the fabric of his black jeans. His whole body tingled as he stared at the smiling vampire, eyes wide.
"Damnit, Ezra!"
Ezra just raised one eyebrow. Chris felt the insane wish to either strangle that man or simply grab him and kiss him breathless. He tried to chase the thought away, but it kept nagging at his mind, driving him on.
"Significant declaration, Chris. 'Damnit, Ezra' appears to accurately illustrate the characteristics of your predicament."
Chris released a breath he hadn't even noticed holding. He looked directly into those green eyes; eyes that were burning with a cold fire right now.
"What are you doing to me?" he whispered.
"Do you think you're the only one feeling like this?"
Ezra pointed toward his crotch, and Chris blushed slightly as he became acutely aware of the results the small touch had just caused. But then he saw Ezra smile, saw amusement sparkle in those green eyes, and the vampire shifted slightly, spreading his legs a little to allow Chris a closer look at his own - oh hell!
 "It's nothing less than what you are doing to me." He rose slowly. "I only touched you... I thought of you and no one else for the last weeks, ever since we met again. We suffer from the same... problems, Chris. Maybe we should find a solution together?"
Chris swore again and let his body decide his next step. With two long strides he stood in front of the man, placing his hands left and right of the vampire's head, holding him. He bent his head and - finally, his mind seemed to scream - kissed him fiercely. He could feel Ezra hesitating for a split second before the other man reacted, melting into his body.
 

Shawn watched the scene unfold, head tilted slightly to one side, then her tail flicked once. A look of satisfaction crossed her feline features and she turned to the connecting door, scratching at it. She meowed softly, scratching more. Suddenly the door was opened a crack, just wide enough to let the cat slip through, then firmly shut once more.
Neither of the two men even noticed it.
On the other side of the door, Shawn was lifted and cradled into two arms.
"Well done, kitty," Buck murmured and scratched the little cat behind the ears, which earned him a satisfied purr.
"Interesting Plan B you had there." Vin grinned, leaning arms crossed in front of his chest against the doorframe to the bedroom.
"Yeah, well," Buck grinned back, "didn't you notice this little one was special?"
"Hah. You didn't either. Just sheer luck, Bucklin."
"So what? The little one here's one hell of a matchmaker. A pity we didn't have one like her back then."
"Who says we hadn't?"
"What? What's that supposed to mean? Vin, damnit ... Tanner ... !"
But Vin had already disappeared into the room behind him.
"Stop stroking that cat, and start looking after this one ... "
"Mwrr!"
Shawn meowed sharply as she was dropped rather quickly onto the couch and started cleaning up her black fur, looking after the departing form of Buck Wilmington. A few minutes later she sniffed the air, flicked her ears back and forth, purred with amusement and curled up into a furry ball on the couch. It would take a while until she would have company again.

*

Chris found himself lying on the floor with an armful of Ezra on top of him, nipping at his neck and sending shudders of desire through is body. He had no clear recollection of how he had gotten here. One moment he had plundered the willing mouth, the next his knees had buckled under him. The vampire made quick work of shirt and pants, stroking the length of his body in the process. Chris dug his hands into Ezra's shoulders moaning deep in his throat as Ezra's hands wandered down south, the fingers closing around his hardness. He gasped both in surprise and desire when he felt the familiar tingle down his spine. His back arched involuntarily into the other man's touch, and he simply exploded with a barely suppressed scream.
"Oh hell," Chris whispered, breathless.
The vampire bent down to kiss the blond, letting his lips lightly trace over their counterparts, applying only a little pressure at a time. Chris answered the butterfly touch, opening up, drawing him in, and Ezra deepened the contact.
Larabee looked directly into the catlike eyes he had dreamed of so many time before- my god, far too long. The desire was still there, in his soul, in Ezra's eyes. He felt relieved because the bothersome ache had been released, but something else had remained, had hung on. The lust, the desire, the need to have this man....
"Ezra."
"Uhm-hm."
"We're on the floor," Chris murmured, hands running down the length of the other man's body.
"Well observed."
"It's kinda awkward."
"Uhm-hmm."
"Especially since there is a perfectly good bed in the other room," Chris finished, not believing his own words.
Ezra smiled. "Yes, there is." He stood fluidly, holding out a hand.
Chris took it and found himself effortlessly pulled up. Standish didn't release his hand as he turned and walked toward the bedroom. He kicked the door shut behind him. He turned, only to find himself pinned to the wall, his mouth possessed and thoroughly kissed. Hands ran over his skin and Chris gave as good as he got, feeling Ezra's hardness against his thigh.
It was also the moment he discovered that, unlike himself, Ezra was still fully clothed. It was a condition he planned to change. Now! The vampire didn’t put up any fight as he relieved of the borrowed outfit, throwing it all to the ground, heedless of where it landed. He never lost contact with the other man, kissing, licking and nipping along the exposed skin.
Damn, if they went on like this, they wouldn't make it to the bed - again. With a reluctant groan he pushed Ezra away, but not before the vampire had teased his nipples to hard little nubs, making him crave for more.
"Bed," Chris rasped.
"Your wish is my command," Ezra replied huskily.
Before Chris could react he was pulled over to the bed and flung on it. The vampire smiled as he stood over him, broadly this time, eyes raking over the slender body. Chris felt something inside of him starting to boil. He wanted this man. Now!
With a swift move Ezra swung one leg over Chris's hips and straddled the other man, pinning him down with his weight.
"Chris." The voice slowly drawled into his ears as Ezra bent down and started nibbling at Chris's neck. "What do you want?"
Larabee's hips bucked as Ezra's hardness met his own. He moaned and started stroking the vampire's side and back, somewhere in his mind wondering about the smoothness, until he couldn't stand it no longer. With a low growl he rolled Ezra onto his back, his hands raking over the man's body, stroking, caressing.
"You!" he hissed. "I want you."
Finally able to reach every inch of his lover's body, Chris took the opportunity, with hands, lips and tongue until he felt Ezra writhe underneath him, heard the soft moans becoming gasps as the vampire started to pant heavily. The gasp turned into a sharp yelp as Chris's hands wandered between the man's legs.
"Lord!" Standish exclaimed, eyes screwed shut. He raised his hips further.
Chris touched the straining hardness, running a finger along the full length to the top, then down again. Ezra whimpered, trembling, then gasped loudly in surprise as the wandering finger touched deeper.
"I want you," Chris repeated, voice rough and needy.
"Chris... lube... drawer...." Ezra managed.
 

Ezra moaned deep in his throat as Chris finally called the shots and threw him onto his back, becoming a whirlwind of passion.
"I want you."
The three words ignited a fire inside him that nothing would be able to put out - except one thing. Lord, he wanted the man, too. Had wanted him ever since the beginning of this case. All he managed to get out was the place where he knew Vin kept some of the lube before he decided to just let his body give into the needs he had buried for such a long time. He wrapped his legs around Chris's waist and allowed himself to be taken away by this storm of desire and yearning, screaming his lover's name as Chris's fervent thrusts were taking them both over the edge and into a completion he hadn't felt for so many years.
His arms came around the hot body of his lover as Chris sank forward, trying not to smother him. Ezra just pulled him close, very well able to support the weight. A kiss was placed against his neck and Ezra smiled dreamily.

*

“You think we can take a careful peek?”
Vin chuckled as he watched his lover walk over to the connecting door, Shawn at his heels.
“Didn’t know you were that much of a voyeur,” he teased.
Buck grinned and waggled his eyebrows. “You know I like to watch.”
Vin snorted. “Ogling at me under the shower doesn’t count.”
“Who says you were the only one I watched?”
Vin tossed a pillow into his general direction, nearly hitting the small, black cat that was looking back and forth between them.
“Mwrrt!”
“Sorry, Shawn,” Vin called, chuckling.
“He always sucked at ball games,” Buck whispered loudly, looking at the cat conspiratorially.
“Uh-huh! Don’t listen to him. He’s just jealous.”
“Of what?” Buck exclaimed.
Vin walked to the door and pressed one ear against it. “Sht!” he made sharply.
“Well?”
“No sounds.”
“Is that good or bad?”
“Mwrt-row!”
“Oh, really?” Buck asked. “I think we should send in the vanguard.” He shot the cat a meaningful look.
“Mrrr!” Shawn agreed.
Vin unlocked the door and opened it a crack. Shawn slipped inside and stopped a few feet into the room, sniffing.
“So?” Buck asked, leaning over Vin to peek.
Vin, equally peeking, shrugged. “I can see something on the floor.”
“Anyone we know?”
A chuckle. “I think it’s some pants and more….”
Buck nodded. “A very good sign.”
Shawn sniffed some more, then sauntered back, looking pleased. “Mwwrt!” she declared.
“I think that says it all,” Vin laughed and closed the door after the cat.
“Oh?”
“Yep. Let’s give them some more time.”
“Mrrrow!”

*

How long had he dreamed of this? How long had he starved himself for the loving touch? How long since he had felt so content, with a warm body in his arms, the echoes of their lovemaking in his heart and soul?
Too damn long.
"Ezra?"
"Hm?"
Ezra couldn't completely suppress the moan that slipped as he moved in his lover's arms. God, that man had come over him like - yep, his ancestor. Larabees. In some aspects they appeared to be all the same, Ezra mused with a faint smile. Maybe something in the genes? The smile widened. One hell of a gene pool then....
"That was ... "
"Indeed." Ezra turned around and placed a soft kiss on Chris's lips, surprised as the other man hesitated.
"Uhm, Ez?"
"Yes?"
"What just happened here?"
The vampire chuckled softly. "I thought that was obvious."
Chris grimaced. "I know what happened," he growled. "It's just... what the hell was that?!"
"It's called 'release," Ezra murmured as he caressed him, pushing some strands of hair out of Chris's face. "We both needed it."
Larabee gave him a lop-sided grin. "I figured that. Hell, what a ride..." Suddenly he frowned.
“What?” Ezra asked quietly.
“Uh…we…. We didn’t have…” Chris cleared his throat. “Protection,” he then said softly.
The vampire almost laughed as he looked into the embarrassed eyes of his lover. “Chris, we don’t need protection. I’m a vampire. You can’t catch anything from me.”
“What?” Larabee shot him a confused look.
“Aside from being sterile, we can’t transmit any kind of disease, and we can’t catch any either. It’s okay.”
“Good to know.”
Chris pushed himself up and leaned over him, unconsciously putting some weight onto Standish's hips as he kissed him. Ezra hissed involuntarily. Damn, he would be sore for at least a day.
Chris frowned. "Did I hurt you?"
"No, Chris, you did not hurt me." Déjà vu, Ezra, definitely déjà vu. Had that all before. "And before you ask, yes, I have been with men before, and yes, it has been awhile. No, I do not hurt, yes, you can make it up to me next time, and definitely yes, I enjoyed it."
"That wasn't...." Chris blinked, looking like he had been overrun by a steam train. "What?"
Ezra chuckled.
"How long exactly?"
"How long exactly what?"
"Since you've been with another man?" Chris clarified.
"Oh my ... let me think. We have 2002, right?" Ezra asked lightly.
"Are we talking about years here, Ezra?"
"About one hundred and twenty-two, to be precise."
"What?!" Chris exclaimed, torn between shock and disbelief, letting himself sink back.
 

He had the feeling as if someone had just punched him in the stomach. All right, it was one thing to know of the vampire nature, but a completely different thing to know.
"One hundred and .... "
"Twenty-two. So?"
Ezra looked at him in puzzlement, frowning slightly. Chris avoided his gaze and stared at the ceiling. One hundred and twenty-two years without any ... He swallowed hard, as he realized what exactly Ezra had just told him: that he hadn't had anybody since his ancestor. Great! That didn't really help erase his feeling of uneasiness. God, he had finally given in to his body's needs, had finally stopped fighting and allowed himself to be drawn into the vampire's arms. And, he had to admit, it had been one hell of an experience, something he definitely wanted to repeat. So why the hell wasn't he feeling any better? Why was there still something nagging at the back of his mind, that little unnerving voice that seemed to tell him there was still something missing, still something to be done?
"How... I mean... why?"
Ezra shrugged slightly. "Somehow... it never came up... never felt right..."
"Damn...."
 

The vampire sat up halfway and leaned over him, smiling. "That about describes it," he murmured, tracing Chris's collarbone. "I swear you didn't hurt me. I'm fine." He recalled the oh-so similar first time with his first lover. "I wanted you, too," he added. "Very, very much."
Chris caught the playful hand and gave Ezra a tentative smile. Their fingers entwined and Standish leaned down for a long, slow and passionate kiss.
"Ezra?" Chris murmured when they separated.
"Hm?"
"What now?"
Green eyes met hazel ones and Ezra smiled slightly as he saw the seriousness in them. "What do you mean?" he wanted to know.
"Where do we go from here?"
Another smile. Straight to hell, he thought. Because I love you. "Where do you want to go?"
"It's not nice to answer a question with a question," Chris chastised mildly.
Ezra chuckled. "Will you answer it anyway?"
A sigh. "I don't know," Larabee finally said, looking thoughtful. "I dreamed of this... with you. I wanted it like nothing else before. But now... I'm not sure."
"About what we did?"
He shook his head. "No. What we did... I wanted it; still want it." He grinned briefly. "But there are so many unknown factors... more than I ever had in a relationship."
A relationship. Ezra's heart nearly missed a beat. He sat up, looking at the man at his side.
"What are you afraid of?"
"Huh?"
"I said, what are you afraid of? Me? What I am?"
"No ..."
"You're a bad liar, Chris Larabee. You are afraid of what I am. Is it because I'm a vampire? Or because I'm a man? From what I can tell that couldn't be it, I guess you've been with men before..."
"Yep...."
"So it's the vampire."
Ezra swallowed as he looked at Chris, saw the doubt and uneasiness in the hazel eyes, and - fear? He could feel his heart sink at the way Chris responded to his questions.
"So it's the vampire," he murmured again.
Great. He had just slept with the man, shared a passionate encounter, but obviously Chris had come to his senses, had started thinking with his brain again, and had come to the decision that he didn't want to be further involved with a monster! Ezra stiffened and started to wriggle himself out of the embrace he was still held in.
"No."
The firm tone surprised Ezra. "What?"
"No. It's not the vampire I'm ... afraid of. It's ... god, I wish I knew it, Ez. "
Chris turned a little, and Ezra could see that he was open now, honest. Those expressive eyes held his and though he searched, Ezra found no revulsion in them.
Chris sat up, facing his lover. "I know what you are, Ezra. I don't care, really. I found out that I couldn't care less a while ago."
"Part of you still fears me," Standish said softly.
Chris reached out and cupped one cheek, tracing the lips he had kissed thoroughly not to long ago with his thumb.
"I'm afraid of what I don't know and with you, it's a lot. You seem to know so much about me... and I have no idea who you are, except for what you told me."
Ezra caught the hand as he slowly understood what Chris was telling him. Of course, he should have known. A Chris Larabee always wanted to know exactly what or who he was dealing with... Well, that could be arranged. A smile started to form on his features.
"I'll answer any questions you have, Chris. Any at all. I want you to know."
"Even about him?"
Ezra held the hazel gaze steadily. "Yes, even about him. I told you I loved him. It's the truth. The man held my heart and soul, made me complete. I lost him a long time ago and never wanted to have anyone ever again." He squeezed the hand. "You are no replacement, Chris. You never were. What we share, what I want to share with you, is something new, and different..."
Chris regarded their joined hands. "I know that now, Ezra. Only too well. I'm sorry I reacted so badly, but it was too much." He exhaled softly, shaking his head. "Start over?" he asked as he looked up.
The vampire's face split into a dimpled smile. "All the way from the start?" he teased.
Chris chuckled and shook his head again.
Ezra grew serious. "I want us to start over again, Chris," he answered. "If you want to know about me, ask. About whatever."
"I'd like to know about your world," Chris said softly.
"My world?"
A nod.
Ezra felt a slow smile cross his lips. "The best way to do that it to experience it."
He climbed out of the bed and started to get dressed. Chris watched him, confused.
"What are you ...?"
"Get dressed, Chris,” Ezra interrupted him cheerfully. “Sun's just down. I show you my life, my city. My world."
"Ezra, I don't think that is a good idea. You're supposed to hide in here. Vampire killer out there after you, remember?"
"Chris, I am perfectly capable of defending myself. How do you think I survived for the last 150 years? Besides," Ezra shot a gold-flashed grin at his lover, "you're with me."
Chris gazed at the broadly grinning vampire. Oh hell ....

* * *

They arrived at The Grotto an hour later, after getting stuck in a traffic jam for a while. Chris noticed the way some of the patrons glanced at Ezra in a way he could only describe as fearful. Ezra's eyes wandered over the people as if looking for someone, and then he smiled briefly. Chris followed Ezra's gaze and saw the man the vampire had been looking for approach them. Luther. The huge, dark-skinned vampire stretched out a hand in a greeting and Ezra took it.
"Ezra. Good to see you again," the man rumbled.
"Luther. Something's going on I should know about?"
"Not really. Rumors about you having left the city, being killed, that stuff. Now that you showed up again...." The man shrugged. "You know how it works."
"Indeed."
"Oh, wait a minute, there is something., Luther added.
"Oh?"
"Some rumors say there's a new vampire in town. I wasn't able to confirm it yet."
Ezra looked thoughtful, then smiled again. "No problem, Luther. Well done."
Chris, who was standing behind Ezra, looked at the man with growing bewilderment. Why should Luther report to Ezra in such a way, unless....? Then he noticed the big vampire's gaze on him, Luther looking quite thoughtful. Oh no, he wouldn't... would he? Chris remembered the incident when Ezra had paid him a visit after he had... and Standish had been able to smell it. Luther started to grin. He nodded at Chris once, and laid a big hand on Ezra's shoulder, squeezing it briefly, before he turned around with a twinkle, leaving a deeply embarrassed Chris Larabee behind.
"Ezra?"
"Hm?"
"Did he... I mean, he didn't... right?" There was a barely hidden desperation in his voice.
"Oh yes, he did," Ezra answered, eyes sparkling as Chris blushed. Geeez, and they were surrounded by vampires ...
"Can every vampire ....?"
"Yep."
On my god!
"Where's that convenient floor to sink into when you need it?" Chris muttered under his breath.
 

Ezra couldn't help grinning as he saw the fearless Chris Larabee blush. It wasn't something one saw every day, but he had to admit he liked it. Well, it hadn't been quite fair, but Chris knew about a vampire's ability to smell pheromones, right? He had told him not too long ago, for crying out loud! And with their none-too recent encounter, both men were practically covered with the other's scent.
"C'mon, Chris, we have someplace else to go."
"Where else?"
"Just you wait and see."

*

Five hours later Chris's head was swimming with all the impressions he had collected. Ezra had led him through half the town, showed him several real exclusive clubs and other places, and from the way he was greeted in each and every one of them, Chris could tell Standish was someone in this city. He seemed to be well respected throughout the community.
They stopped in one of the city's larger parks. Chris needed some time out to clear his head and rearrange his mind around what he had seen. They sat down on one of the park benches.
"Tell me about him."
The softly-voiced question broke the silence. Ezra sighed softly, feeling a brief flash of emotional pain. Even after a century, he sometimes felt rather melancholic when it came to the gunslinger who had had such an impact on his life. He had come to terms with Chris's death, but sometimes it still evoked a strange kind of sadness.
"He was very much like you in many regards," he finally said.
"Oh?"
Ezra grinned. "Same eyes, same hair. Yours is shorter."
Chris snorted.
"Chris was... someone who had gone through a lot, who carried a lot of scars. Inside and outside. He had lost his wife and son in a fire. It destroyed half his soul back then. He wanted to find the killer, but every time he thought he was closer, it was just another dead end. When he finally discovered the truth, it almost tore him apart once more." Ezra sighed and toyed the strings of his casual jacket. There was a faraway expression in his eyes and voice. "He had a temper, but he was always so very much in control. Even when he was angry, he never lost that last bit of control. He preferred black and dark gray when he dressed. He was fast when it came to gun fighting, he had a wicked sense of humor that surfaced too rarely, and he had a quick mind."
"Sounds like a man I'd have loved to meet."
Ezra nodded. "Probably."
"How did he die?"
He sighed again. "I'm not sure. He left Four Corners after I had... died..." Ezra stopped.
Chris wanted to say something, but the other man shook his head.
"It's okay, Chris. I had a century to come to terms with it. I have." He smiled.
Larabee gave him a critical look. "Sure," he mumbled, not convinced.
"Chris... your ancestor... he died twenty years after me. He was buried next to me in Four Corners. I didn't find him before that, though I looked. I wish I had. The day I died, the other half of his soul died as well."
"Sorry I asked."
"No, Chris, no." Ezra looked at him. "I've dealt with all this pain a long time ago. It's just... sometimes I can't help feeling echoes of it."
There was a brief silence. Ezra knew Chris wanted to ask more and he waited.
"So, how did you get to know him?" Larabee finally breached the next subject.
Ezra chuckled, his features lighting up. "Our first meeting was less than ideal. Actually, for a while, he was right not to trust me..."
He proceeded to relay the first meeting to his lover, not leaving out a single thing. Chris chuckled sometimes, turned serious, or thoughtful. Ezra continued to relay tales about life in Four Corners, what it was like, what Chris was like day to day. He told him about the others, about the people he had shared two years of his life with.
"What happened to them?" Chris queried softly.
Ezra inhaled deeply. "When I returned, when I found Chris's grave next to mine, Josiah had died. JD had married and become sheriff of Four Corners. The town had grown incredibly fast. Buck had stayed on as well. Nathan had married Rain and moved to the Seminole village. Vin had moved into the reservation." He swallowed briefly. "Don't you dare apologize again," Ezra muttered and glared at him.
"Wouldn't dream of it." Chris smiled briefly.
"I visited them all, but I never showed myself," Ezra went on. "I just wanted to see what had become of them. The only one I revealed myself to was Vin. Back then, I believed he would be the most open-minded to hear my story without seeing a monster in me."
"And you were right?"
"Yes. I stayed with the tribe for a long time..."
"Until he died," Chris finished softly, as if reading his thoughts.
Another nod. "Vin and I... we could talk about a lot of things. For the first time in twenty years I had someone from my past who understood, who listened, and who knew. It was very painful in the beginning, but it freed me somehow. I could be myself with Vin and the tribe. They taught me to accept what I have become," Ezra went on, eyes seeing a distant memory. "I stayed for another year after Vin's death because I promised him to keep an eye on his son and daughter. Then I moved on."
And it was hard, he thought silently, somehow aware that Chris knew it too.
"I'm fine. I'm over it."
Chris looked doubtful, but he didn't say anything.
"Ezra?"
"Yes?"
"From what I saw tonight... you have a position of power in the community, right?"
Ezra nodded slowly. "Yes."
Chris gazed at him. "Who are you?"
"I'm a lot of things, Chris. It will take a while for you to understand most of it. It's complicated. But above all, I want you to understand something about me. I love you, Chris Larabee." Ezra announced quietly.
Chris inhaled deeply and swallowed, looking away from the green gaze. "Ezra, I'm... I'm sorry, this is a little... too much right now. I have to... think it over, get it straight, okay?"
He turned away from the vampire, not wanting to be distracted by the man's direct presence. He rose from the park bench, taking a few steps away from him.
 

Ezra felt a little twinge as he saw Chris turn away after he had just declared his love. On the other hand, what had he expected.
Give the man time, something inside him whispered, his whole perception of the world has been shattered the last few days. He needs to get it back together.
Laughter drifted over from the fair grounds. People were calling out to one another, two groups leaving the grounds and talking loudly among each other. Ezra felt himself smile as he watched the couples of the group, one of them clearly a gay one.
Something moved.
Ezra's head jerked around but it was already too late. He erupted from the bench, only to freeze in his movements. Two men were standing with Chris, one of them directly behind him. The man behind Chris was broad-shouldered, dressed in a sweater and jeans, one arm wrapped around Larabee's neck. Ezra's eyes fell on the gun held against Chris's head. The color had drained from his lover's face and one hand dug into the muscular forearm of the goon, trying to dislodge it enough for him to breathe.
"Let him go," he whispered.
The other man laughed and the goon behind Chris tightened his hold, making the blond agent gasp. Ezra's stomach tightened into a painful knot. He was acutely aware of the raspy breathing of his lover, that he was getting less oxygen than he should.
"Not a wrong move, Standish," the other man said. "I don't have the slightest problem with killing your latest little plaything."
 

Chris swallowed at the harshly uttered words as he realized what happened. Ezra had been located and at it had been his fault because he had been too careless.
Your latest little plaything...
The man holding a gun at his temple had to be a vampire to know what he was talking about, a part of Chris's mind realized. Another part just flinched in utter pain at the words.
Your latest little plaything...
He wasn't able to think the thought to its very end. The arm around his throat tightened and he nearly choked. Colorful dots danced in front of his eyes as he was fighting for air, slowly suffocating. He struggled more, but it was to no avail. Through his dimming vision he noticed the black limousine, that was parked on the street not too far away. The other man waved his gun toward Ezra and forced him to get into the car. Chris saw the look Ezra gave him. His green eyes held Larabee's, completely open. Chris wanted to cry out and he started to struggle, recalling all the training he had had as an agent when joining the CSI and The Branch. It was no use against the superior strength of the vampire behind him.
Darkness started to cloud the edges of his vision. His air supply was running out and his lungs were aching for oxygen. Chris felt the world detach itself, float, and he was floating as well. The pain in his neck and chest seemed to be secondary all of a sudden. Then everything went dark... the world ceased to exist.

*

Ezra had been forced to comply with his kidnappers' orders as they held the one person he wouldn't want to see come to harm. He had no idea why they wanted him in the limo; he had expected to die right on the spot. Oh well... maybe it would give him a chance to extricate himself from this unfortunate change of plans.
Chris started to struggle as his captor kept squeezing his neck and Ezra felt panic rise. He stopped his approach on the limo, but a rough jab of a gun into his back stopped him.
"Move!" the man hissed.
He climbed into the car, acutely aware of his lover's fading strength. Ezra watched Chris fall to the ground, limp, unmoving, pale. Anger churned inside him, doubled by worry and fear. He wanted to erupt from inside the limousine, run to him, but something was plunged into his upper arm.
Ezra felt a burning pain where the needle had entered his flesh. The pain quickly spread through his system, the substance now in his blood, and became a cramping agony and he fell forward with a gasp. He heard someone close the door with a loud 'thud', then car started to move.
His awareness faded, but never too much, and the pain didn't diminish. If anything, it grew worse.

* * *

"Chris?"
Someone shook him, and Chris moaned. His head felt like it had been split open with an axe, his whole body ached from laying on the hard ground... Wait a minute... Ezra! He jerked up.
"Ezra!"
Big mistake. Chris felt the world spin around him and hadn't it been for two strong hands to hold him he would have fallen back.
"Whoa there, easy," a gravely, but known voice murmured.
Chris blinked his blurred vision aside and looked around, noticing a) it was still night and b) the voice belonged to Luther.
"Luther? What... hell!" The world did a merry dance as he tried to rise once more.
"I said, easy. Not without reason, Chris."
Chris let his head sink onto his knees. "Ohhh... Ezra! Damnit!"
"What happened?"
"Kidnapped," he managed.
Luther swore viciously and helped Chris up. Larabee was still unsteady on his feet and thankful that the larger man was there.
"Who?"
"Dunno. All I saw was this black limo, two guys with guns ... they must've been vampires."
"What makes you think that?"
Chris shot Luther a sharp look, but then realized there was just pure concern in that question.
"They noticed," he snapped, as he remembered what exactly had made him think that.
Your latest little plaything...
"And they were damn fast."
"Vampires, hm?" Luther muttered thoughtfully and grabbed his cell phone.
"Whatcha doin'?"
"Notifying the community. If they were vampires, we'll find them."
Something in the vampire's voice made Chris shiver, and he almost pitied the kidnapper. Almost.

* * *

Ezra had never completely lost consciousness. He was continually growing weaker and weaker, and part of his mind told him that he had probably been injected with a watered down version of Hawthorn. It couldn't have been the highly concentrated extract of the first assassination attempt. He'd be dead by now if it were. The injection had been enough to knock him out and keep him weak, and it could be battled with enough living blood, but Ezra doubted he would be treated to a bottle or two. He severely doubted he would get any kind of treatment any time soon.
He registered that the car had stopped, that he was manhandled out of it, but he couldn't make out much. It was still night, but he was no longer in the city. Somewhere outside, he thought fuzzily. Dusty... sandy... very much nature....
The men dropped him and he bounced onto the ground, hard enough to jar his bones. He groaned softly and tried to roll onto his back. A vicious kick into the ribs assisted him and he was flung onto his back, staring at the cloudy night sky. Someone appeared in his field of vision.
"So you are him, hm?" the blurry thing said, the voice clearly female.
His vision cleared slightly and Ezra gazed up into the pale features of a woman with curly, brownish hair. She was fashionably dressed, as if she was just on her way to a party.
"Well, brother, it was nice to meet you. Too bad it couldn't have been under different circumstance, but as it is, I enjoy the comforts and amenities of being an only child." She laughed and turned around.
Ezra's muddled brain wrapped itself around the words and somewhere in the depth of his mind, something screamed in realization.

* * *

The sun broke over the horizon and slowly boiled up into the morning sky. The night shadows began to shrink back and the smell of wet sand began to recede. It was going to be a hot day, out here in the desert.

* * *

Chris watched as AD Travis slowly shook his head, hands clasped behind his back, looking out of the window of his office. It was just past seven-thirty in the morning, a very early time for the AD to be in, but looking at the circumstances, it wasn't much of a surprise. Chris had called him after he had been clear-headed enough to hold a coherent conversation, which had been a while after the attack. Luther had brought him to the Grotto, poured some water into him, and told the exhausted and dizzy man to take it easy. Being nearly strangled to death left you weak-kneed and confused.

"I notified the community," Luther said calmly. "They'll keep an ear on the ground, and there is some research I can do on my own. I'll keep you informed."
"Wait a minute," Chris held the vampire back. "What were you doing there?"
Luther just grinned. "What do you think? Following the two of you, of course. Even if Ezra doesn't know it, I've kept an eye on that man for over thirty years now. I owe him, Chris. Big time. I can't pay him back what he did for me. Unfortunately I wasn't fast enough or I would've seen those guys, could've stopped them. Sorry for that. But I'll do what is in my powers to find him, and bring him back alive."
"Thanks, Luther."
"You'll find me at the Grotto if you  hear anything, or need me."

"Chris, I expected more of you," the voice of Travis jerked him out of his memories.
Larabee winced as if he had been physically slapped. He had gone about this like a rookie. Hell, like a civilian with less than half a brain! They had worked hard to keep Ezra safe, to keep his location a secret. No one would have suspected Vin's apartment. They had planted false information, with Ezra's help, that he was either not in town, dead, in a safehouse, moving around... pick one. It had worked perfectly well - until he, Chris Larabee, had let it go all to hell.
Because...
Because why? What had made him do it?
Even now he couldn't rationally explain it. He couldn't even tell his boss that he had been and still was physically attracted to the man, who was also an old friend of the Assistant Director. Hell, he couldn't very well tell him that he had slept with him! Or that he wanted to again. Chris bit his lower lip as that thought hit him.
Travis turned around from his study of the early morning scenery. "What made you leave a perfectly safe hiding?"
"I don't have an explanation, sir," Chris heard himself say.
What should he say? That Ezra wanted to show him the world of vampires? That he had given him an insight into his life? That they had talked about his past?
"Did Mr. Standish, in any way, influence you in your decision?" Travis went on.
"Influence me?"
"You know what he is, Chris. I'm pretty sure you know what he can do. Did he use his powers to force you into leaving with him?"
He swallowed. His powers. Shit, why did that question bring back memories of both of them in bed, Ezra kissing him, his hands on his skin.... Chris forced it all back.
"Not that I'm aware of, sir," he murmured.
"Then why?"
Chris closed his eyes. Gawd, he was tired. He hadn't had any sleep since... well, he couldn't remember. The short nap at the Grotto, just before the others had arrived to pick him up, hadn't helped.
"He wanted to show me his world, sir," he said softly. There. He had said it. It sounded lame, a weak explanation, like a lie....
There was a brief silence and Chris refused to look at Travis. The older man cleared his throat.
"So you decided to go along and see the sights? Where did you go? The night clubs?"
"Yes."
"Had fun?"
Chris still stared straight ahead, just to the left of his boss. "Sir, it wasn't for fun. He... cleared a few things up for me, made me understand what being a vampire means."
Travis snorted. "Well, then you're way ahead of me and I've known the man for nearly thirty-five years."
Chris briefly let his eyes flick to Travis.
"What you did was reckless, stupid and I should suspend you, Agent Larabee," the AD went on. "Ezra Standish was in mortal danger and because of you, the enemy now has him."
"I'll get him back, Sir."
"How?"
Chris hesitated. Finally he met the other man's eyes head on. "The vampire community has been alerted and they are looking for him. Whatever information there is, it will get back  to me."
"How? Those bastards trust no one outside the community unless he's vouched for by a respected person of the community." Travis's eyes narrowed. "Or unless you have an inside source."
"Yes, sir."
"Luther?"
Chris sighed silently. Apparently Travis knew the large vampire as well. "Yes, sir."
"I see."
"Sir, I will find him," Chris vowed, voice serious.
"I know you will, but the question is, will he still be alive?"

*

Chris left Travis's office, shoulders slumped, looking pale. The rest of his team sat or stood in the hallway, taking in the signs of their leader's current state of mind. Buck exchanged a silent look with Vin, who looked slightly worried.
"Well?" he wanted to know.
"I'm not suspended," Chris answered slowly. "But Travis is not happy."
"Understandable," Nathan commented, which got him a dark look from Chris.
"I know that he was kidnapped right in front of my eyes!" Chris snapped, angry about his own behavior that had put Ezra into danger. God, why hadn't he insisted on staying here, where it was perfectly safe for the vampire? "No need to rub it in!"
"Whoa, pard, calm down," Buck advised softly.
Larabee had called them after he had arrived at the Grotto, informing everyone of what had occurred..
"What now?" Josiah asked.
Actually, Chris had no idea. He was at a complete loss. They didn't know who was behind the killings, they had no name, no real description, and while there had been two attempts on Ezra already, neither had left them with any clues.
"We look," was all he said and marched past them.
"Yeah, but for what?" JD mumbled.

* * *

It was around two in the afternoon that Chris drove back to Vin's place. He had been almost aimlessly cruising the streets, trying to clear his head, trying to think of what to do; and trying not to think that Ezra might already be dead. The killer had him in his powers and all other victims had been found dead later on. Chris shuddered as he thought of the photographs of the bodies, especially the ones from San Francisco and New York. Burned... beheaded...
Stop it!
He exhaled sharply and leaned against the door, more tired than ever. It wouldn't do him any good to think of Ezra as dead. He couldn't be dead!
Chris walked into the apartment and was nearly overrun by a small, furry whirlwind. Shawn meowed plaintively, rubbing against him, wide green eyes looking desperate and sad. The question clearly visible on her feline features was simple: where is my two-legs?
Chris rubbed the little cat's fur and scratched her behind the ears, but this time the purr wasn't one of pleasure but shared pain.
"I know," he breathed softly as he picked her up. "I know."
Chris sank onto the couch. Shawn buried her head in the crook of his arm, her whole body shaking. He stroked and petted the little cat, wondering if she felt what her owner was going through.
He couldn't lose him. Not now. Gawd, Lord, not now!
Shawn meowed, her voice small and muffled by his clothes.
They sat together for a while, Chris trying to take his mind off the gruesome images his brain had to offer. Shawn was still agitated and Larabee suspected she knew Ezra was in danger. What had the vampire told him? She was a familiar; she was more than the average house cat. She and Ezra shared more than a pet-owner relationship.
"I failed," Chris whispered. "I behaved like a love-struck teenager, not a professional. Damn."
The little cat in his arms mewed pitifully again and started to bury herself in his shirt. She was looking for comfort.
Not only her, Chris thought and pulled Shawn a little closer.
He rose from the couch, still holding on to the cat. Shawn didn't protest when he carried her down to the car and deposited her on the passenger seat. She curled up, lost and alone, huge eyes mournfully looking at him. Chris gave her a wan smile, then started the car.

* * *

The Grotto was still empty this time of the day. A few early birds were drinking sodas at the only open bar. Chris had found that he had had no problems getting in. The bouncer just smiled at the blond man, who was carrying a small, black cat, and Chris marched right in. He didn't know what he expected to find here. What was he doing here? Why had he come? He should be out on the street, searching for clues.
Chris got himself a glass of water and sat down, looking around the room. Shawn was meowing plaintively and seemed to want to crawl into his shirt again, seeking out every source of comfort she could find. Chris noticed that with every passing minute the little cat seemed to feel worse, suffering more as she started to tremble slightly. He stroked the black fur carefully, trying to soothe the small creature.
"I miss him, too." Chris whispered softly
"Chris."
He looked up and briefly smiled. Above him, Luther towered like a dark angel.
"Luther."
"What brings you here."
"Wish I had a clue."
Luther looked at the small heap on Chris's lap and sadly shook his head. "She feels it, too. She is born to know everything that happens to the person she is bonded to. She knows something's wrong with Ezra."
Chris didn't say a word.
"No one in the community has an idea where he might be," the vampire went on as he gestured at Chris to follow him to a more private area. "Some say the new vampire who arrived a few days ago has something to do with it, but I haven't been able to confirm it. All I know is that it's a woman and that she's visiting. She's apparently from Philadelphia."
They entered the back office and Luther closed the door.
"Any connection to Ezra's kidnapping?" Chris wanted to know.
"None. I'm just checking newcomers in case of trouble. She's been keeping a low profile, didn't even come to any of the clubs, and she's not much of a public figure."
"Luther, you know," Chris said thoughtfully after a long stretch of silence, "there is something ..."
"...wrong with this picture? Yep. If the guy wants Ezra dead ...
"... why not just kill him and be over with it?"
Luther looked at Chris and frowned. "There is more behind this than meets the eye," he murmured.
"Much more." Chris agreed.
And he didn't like it. Not a single bit.
"We will find him."
"When? How? Luther, it's broad daylight out there, almost noon. He must ... "
Chris couldn't stand it any longer, he had to move. With Shawn cradled in his arms he started to pace to release his nervous energy.
Yes, with the sun out, Ezra would be dead soon.

* * *

It was a hunch, plain and simple. Vin didn't really work on hunches, but sometimes they paid out. So he listened to the little voice in his mind that had told him to drive out here in the middle of nowhere and look for their missing friend.
Dead Man's Gulch was a bone dry and rather desolate stretch of desert. There were a few lonely and rather dead bushes clinging to the ground, and among them rocks had been scattered as if a giant child had left its marbles after a game. In the distance, Vin saw the mountains through a haze of heated air that was only slowly cooling off in the approaching evening dusk. It was still hot and uncomfortable out here, after nearly ten hours of non-stop sun, but soon it would be very, very cold.
This had been the place where they suspected Sean Millwood had been left to die. There were no traces left, of course. But the soil samples had panned out. Dead Man's Gulch had a specific concentration of salt because it wasn't that far from the farthest arms of the salt lake the city had its name from. The same concentration had been found in the samples taken from Millwood's clothes and from under his finger nails.
So the hunch had poked its head into Vin's subconsciousness and planted the idea that if Millwood had been left to die out here, maybe the killer was stupid enough to leave Ezra here as well.
As he stopped the car, Buck stared out of the windscreen, looking thoughtful.
"Buck?" Vin asked softly.
"Just wondering," the chemist answered, voice slightly distant. "Ezra and the sun...."
Vin nodded slowly. Vampires and the sun. He didn't burst into flames and crumble into dust, but his tolerance wasn't rather high. Ezra had tried to explain it to him before, when they had visited the Grotto for him to meet his contact. Vampires could be out in the sun. They didn't get sunburn or blisters. But they grew weaker until they were too weak to crawl anywhere. And finally they'd just wither away and die. Ezra had been kidnapped in the early morning hours, so the kidnappers had had him for over twelve hours. He had spent most of them out here, in the middle of nowhere, in the sun. No shade, no shelter....
"Let's go," he said calmly.
They left the car and started to walk toward the formation of rocks, eyes peeled for anything that could be a body. Dead Man's Gulch was a large area, but it wasn't impossible to search. Vin slithered and slid down an incline, dust whirling up around him, until he reached a dried-out river bed. He looked along the sparse bushes and suddenly stopped.
"Buck!" he hollered and ran over to where he could see a leg sticking out from among the brush.
Buck arrived in a cloud of dust, coughing, but it didn't stop him. He ran over to where Vin knelt beside the body.
"Ezra?" he asked, coughing again.
"Yeah."
Vin carefully rolled the man onto his back. Ezra looked pale; paler than normal. His skin had an almost grayish touch and he appeared waxen. There were no open wounds, no visible bruises, but that meant little. Vin almost hesitantly searched for a pulse. After a second of panic he felt one. Weak. Incredibly weak.
"Got a pulse," he told Wilmington.
"We've got to get him to the car and somewhere safe quickly."
"Yep."
Buck carefully lifted the unconscious man and with some assistance from Vin he staggered up the incline. They hurried to the car and while Buck wrapped their barely alive burden into a blanket, Vin speed-dialled Chris's number.
"Chris, Vin here. Listen, we found Ezra. He's alive, but barely." He slid into the passenger seat as Buck took over driving. Wilmington floored the accelerator and they took off. "What?.... No, no, he's unconscious.... Huh? No, he's completely out. Listen, the way Buck's driving, we'll be at my place in a few minutes..... Yeah, yeah,... I told you, he's out!"
Vin rolled his eyes in annoyance as Buck shot him a questioning look, meanwhile severely breaking the speed limit as he took the car to new records. The apartment complex they both had their apartments in was nearly at the fringe of the small suburb and they'd be home in another twenty minutes.

* * *

"Chris Larabee, would you stop pacing and listen to me for once?!"
Luther stretched out his arm and grabbed the agitated man, holding him still. Chris whirled around and glared at the vampire, but Luther refused to be impressed and simply smiled at him.
"What do you want, Luther?" Chris snapped. He had no idea where Ezra was or if the vampire was still alive. He didn't want to lose the man he loved with his heart and soul... wait a minute! Love...?
"Chris, he will be all right. Ezra Standish is a fighter, he survived for more than 150 years. He will survive this as well."
Chris blinked at the other man, feeling the strength slowly drain out of his system. He stopped fighting the vice-like grip on his upper arms.
"I don't wanna lose him," he murmured, as Luther gently pushed him toward the couch and made him sit.
"Neither does he, Chris."
"What do you mean?"
"You see," Luther passed him a mug of coffee and sat down beside Chris, "we've known each other for a long time now. About forty years, I think. And in all these years I never saw Ezra Standish develop a relationship whatsoever, neither male nor female. And you can believe me, it wasn't because of the lack of offers, from vampires as well as from humans. I mean, just look at him."
Chris shot him a sharp look, and Luther just chuckled.
"Don't worry, I'm not interested in him that way. Even if I were, he wouldn't touch anyone but you. You see, the thing with Ezra is, he loves you."
"How do you know?"
"Hey, I'm a vampire, yet forgotten? The pheromones you two radiate could make the whole Grotto high."
Chris evaded the laughing eyes, feeling embarrassed.
"But that's not the point, Chris. Ezra hasn't had a relationship for over one hundred-twenty years, since he was re-born. He didn't tell me, not in these words, but I figured it out nevertheless. Not even a fling here or there, and that is something usually every vampire does every now and then. But not him, oh no. Sometimes I was really worried, when I saw him sitting at his desk and staring into nothingness. He was very far away then. Or to say it, the man was damned lonely.
And some years ago he met you for the first time. Man, you should've seen him then. He wasn't to be talked to for a whole week! And you," Luther pointed his index finger at Chris, "you love him, too. Don't you dare to deny it now!"
Larabee sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "I... I just don't know. I mean, you just said it yourself, pheromones and all. I'm feeling like a hormone-stricken teenager, running around half ...errr, every time I even think of him. You can't actually call that love."
"No?"
"No."
 "Why not?" Luther wanted to know, completely serious.
Chris stared at the man, face blank. What the hell was the man implying? "That's not... it's all about... you know..."
"All right, different scenario. Imagine this: you will never be allowed to touch him. How does that feel?"
Chris glared, and Luther grinned.
"Yep, that, too. Now imagine this: you will never see him again."
The glare intensified.
"Last one: you will never see him again because he's already dead."
At that image Chris felt as if something inside him had been broken, fear rushed through his body, and he stiffened. Shawn rubbed her head against his hands, which he must have clenched, and Luther put a reassuring hand on his shoulder.
"See? That's why I call it love," the gravely voice murmured. "And Ezra feels the same. "
Chris looked at Luther, eyes dark with fear and worry, no strength left to hold back any longer.
"But ... "
"No 'but', Chris. He will be found, he will come back, safe and sound. And then," he squeezed Chris's shoulder reassuringly, "you better work it out. It is high time, for the both of you."
"Mwr-RRT!!"
"See? Someone here shares my opinion."
Chris opened his mouth to answer as the sound of his cell phone startled them.

Five minutes later Chris Larabee was having a fit. Anger, pain, frustration and fear were unloading onto one very hapless Vin Tanner, who refused to listen to reason. In the background, Luther was close to having a coronary, growling to himself. When Chris snapped the cell phone shut, the large vampire gave him a demanding look.
"They're driving to Vin's place," Chris sighed.
"Fools!" Luther snapped. "Do they even have the slightest idea how dangerous a nearly dead vampire is?"
"No, and Vin won't listen. He said to meet them at home."
Chris found himself grabbed and shoved toward the exit.
"Hey!"
"We have to be there!" Luther told him fiercely. "If Ezra wakes in that car you can tell your friends good-bye. He'll go for their blood without thinking twice. He's starved to near-insanity because of the sunlight and whatever else they did to him. There's nothing left of the man right now; there's only the animal instinct."
Chris only swallowed hard.
“And if Ezra kills them, you can say good-bye to him as well!” Luther went on ruthlessly. “He won’t survive killing a human being, let alone two, who are also your friends! And his!”
“Ah shit,” Chris breathed, realizing what the vampire was telling him.

Within a minute they were on the road and equally breaking the speed limits. Chris just prayed that they wouldn't run into a patrol car or he might just have to break a few more rules than he had done already.

* * *

"You are completely out of your minds!" Luther hissed, glaring at the two CSI agents.
Vin sighed deeply. "It was the only way. What else should we have done?"
"Follow Chris's orders and leave him where he was!" was the annoyed answer. "If he had woken throughout the drive, you'd be dead!"
"He didn't. We aren't. So let's squabble about this later after we helped Ezra," Buck interrupted whatever else Luther had been about to say.
The vampire glared at him.
"He needs blood," Luther stated, rather unnecessarily since it was about the only thing Ezra lived on.
"Want me to head over to the address I went to before?" Vin immediately volunteered. "Sam something-or-other."
"No." Luther shook his head. "Won't help. Ezra needs warm blood, living blood, not the prepackaged stuff."
"Living..." Buck echoed. "You mean... like... from one of us?"
A nod.
"How much?"
"No more than you'd donate to the blood banks. But before you get any ideas, you're not going to!" the other vampire told them firmly.
"You got a better idea?" Chris wanted to know, voice level. "He needs help. Now. We are that help."
Luther sighed deeply. "Listen, Ezra is phobic about drinking from humans already. If he finds out... and he will, I'm in for it."
"So you'd let him die?" Chris challenged.
"No...."
"You got any other donators hidden around here?" Vin joined in.
"No," Luther answered again, looking almost desperate.
"Okay, then we're it." Chris stepped forward.
"No, not you."
A large, strong hand was placed onto Chris's chest, holding the man back. Larabee shot Luther an angry glare.
"He'll kill me if I let you do this, Chris," the vampire went on seriously. "I'm in deep shit because of this already. And I need you later. You have a different job to do."
"I can do this!" Chris snarled.
"No."
"Chris, stop arguing and listen to the man," Buck interrupted them. "Vin and I will do it. Only us."
Chris looked at Ezra, who lay curled up on the couch, growling softly. He was too weak to really move, but Luther had told them that this might be a misconception. Ezra was close to death, desperate, and prone to spurts of energy if someone came too close.
"How we're gonna do this?" Vin asked matter-of-factly.
Luther shot a last look at Chris, who still glared, then turned to the other two men. "I'll have to hold him, control the feeding, because if we let him be, he'll drain you. We'll use your wrist."
Vin remembered Rev, how he had been close to touching his wrist with his lips as well, and nodded.
"He's gonna bite?"
Luther chuckled.
"Another misconception?" Buck asked, smiling.
"Yes. We don't have fangs."
"Then how..."
Luther reached into his pocket and withdrew a pocket knife. "Each of us has preferences; they vary. I like this." He snapped it open.
Vin only nodded his acceptance. "Let's do it." He held out his right arm.
Luther stepped up to Ezra and the other vampire started to growl, green eyes bright and inhuman. The pale face was drawn, haggard, the skin gray. Vin swallowed and nearly turned around, but one look at Chris stopped him. While his friend looked just as sick as Ezra, there was a resolute expression in his eyes, the decision to see this through, and Vin smiled grimly. Luther took a hold of Ezra, who hissed warningly.
"Ready?" he asked.
Tanner swallowed. "Yeah."
He inhaled deeply and cut into his wrist with the knife. Blood welled up and the moment the first drop appeared, Ezra gave a howl, straining against the larger vampire.
"Lord," Buck mumbled.
Vin bit his lower lip and stepped closer. Ezra grabbed his wrist, hands clamping around it like a vice. Vin yelped, more in surprise than pain, and was pulled forward. Standish's mouth latched onto the open wound and Vin felt his knees buckle as the vampire began to feed.
"Gawd...." he exclaimed.
"Vin?" Buck asked, worried.
"I'm.... okay," he managed. "Hell...." he added breathlessly.
It was an incredible feeling, like a rush. Suddenly Luther wrenched Ezra away from him, Standish howling again, this time in fury. Vin fell from a crouch into a sitting position, feeling light-headed and slightly dizzy. He watched Buck step in, cut into his wrist, and then Ezra was on him as well. When Luther separated them a second time, Ezra didn't fight it. He slumped back into the arms of the larger man, moaning softly.
Luther carefully stroked the brown head. He dug into his pockets and pulled out a cell phone. "Speed dial '1'," he told Chris. "Tell them it's for Ezra and to deliver it here. I'll take care of your friends."
Chris nodded mutely and did as he had been told while the other man helped Vin and Buck over to the other apartment and into bed. The person he called didn't ask too many questions and promised to deliver ASAP.
"Will they be okay?" Chris asked when Luther returned from the other apartment.
"They'll be fine. It's like donating blood. They feel a bit dizzy and weak, but with some rest and food, they'll be okay in a few hours." Luther checked on Ezra again, who still lay slumped on the couch. "Now it's your turn. He trusts you, Chris. He loves you. You have to stay with him. When he comes around, he'll be confused, weak, and probably not very coherent. He'll react to you, though." The large man smiled.
Chris nodded slowly, sitting down next to Ezra, touching him carefully. All the vampire did was sigh softly, burying deeper into the couch.
"Let's get him to the bedroom," Luther decided and lifted him up as if Ezra was a rag-doll.
Chris helped him strip the unresponsive body of the old clothes, then he walked into the bathroom to get a wet towel. He ignored Luther's smile as he cleaned Ezra up as best as he could without putting him in the shower.
"What about you?" he asked the larger vampire.
"Don't worry. Sundown's in an hour or so. You take care of Ezra."
"I will," Chris vowed softly.
"I know. I'll wait for the delivery to arrive and deposit it in the fridge. Give him some if he feels hungry again."
With that Luther left them alone. Chris stripped as well and slipped under the covers, pulling Ezra to him.

* * *

In the other apartment, Buck and Vin lay on the large bed, looking a bit dazed, as if they had been drugged.
"Is it just me, or did that guy just suggest we ...?" Buck murmured lazily, stretching his long frame and curling himself around his lover.
Luther had helped Buck and Vin to their apartment and made sure they were all right.
"Maybe you should ... ah, rest a little," had been the advice he had left them with, as he had guided the two to the bedroom. Somehow Buck got the impression the vampire's voice had held a knowing undertone.
"Yep," Vin whispered, letting his hands slip under Buck's shirt, starting to slowly stroke his lover's skin, noticing the immediate response this caused, as Buck moaned slightly, shifting toward the caress. He had donated blood before, but nothing had ever felt like this. The sensation of Ezra's lips and tongue on his wrist, the pounding of his heart, the flow of his own blood, the sudden rush, all of it had been highly erotic, Vin had to admit. And it had left him horny!
"Did you feel it, too?" Buck murmured, as he turned toward Vin, his hands wandering under his lover's shirt. Vin hissed in pleasure at the light touch.
"God, yes. Dunno what it is, but I'll be damned if I let that go by!"
And with a quick gesture he stripped Buck off his shirt and started a little sucking on his own. Buck only gave a loud groan of appreciation.

* * *

Ezra woke with a start. One moment he was in the darkness, then he rose to the surface of his consciousness. Memories rose with him, unbidden, raw and painful, and he gasped out loud.
No!
The kidnapping, Chris being threatened, the needle in his arm, the excruciating pain... the sun. Ezra's soul screamed in remembered agony and he curled in on himself. He had been dying, plain and simple. His human side had shriveled up, the animal, the monster, had surfaced, trying to survive. Out in the desert there had been no help. But the monster had reigned, had driven him.... and now he was here, feeling weak but alive, more improved. For that to happen....
Ezra whimpered.
Lord, no, please. No, no, no.
He must have killed someone.... it was the only explanation. He had killed to survive and now... he was here. Wherever here was.
That was the moment he became aware of a warmth beside him, of a living, breathing body. Of a smell he knew.
Chris?
"Ezra?" a sleepy voice inquired.
It was Chris....
Ezra tried to push away, feeling suddenly dirty. He had killed. He had erased a life to save his own, and he had sworn himself never to do that ever again. Now it had happened again. Some poor soul had died.
"Ezra, shhhh," Chris tried to calm him. "It's all right."
No! Nothing was all right! He was a killer! A monster.... Tears threatened to fall. Ezra knew he was in a precarious emotional state, unable to control his own reactions, and so he tried to scramble away from the warmth that was Chris Larabee.
Strong arms stopped him, held him.... calmed him. "Ezra, shhhh, love. You're save. You'll be fine."
Love? How could Chris love... this? How? How?!
"Who...?" he managed, voice raw. "Who did I kill?"
In the twilight of the room, Chris's face showed a frown. "Kill? You killed no one."
"Must have," he whispered. "Fed...."
Hands stroked his bare skin. "You didn't kill anyone, Ez. You had some voluntary donations...." There was a smile in Larabee's voice.
Donations? How could anyone have even dared to approach the creature he had been? Whoever had offered himself had to be dead, drained of blood. He wouldn't have been able to control himself.
The hands kept stroking him and Ezra felt himself relax into the familiar touch. His body betrayed him, as did his mind, too weak and confused to do much else but to lean into Chris. Lips brushed over his forehead.
"Sleep," he murmured. "I'm here."
Ezra felt himself falling back into the darkness, wrapped in Chris's arms, held.

* * *

Chris Larabee looked at the body in his arms, a feeling of warm contentment enveloping his mind and soul. Soft breaths touched his bare skin, a sign that the man was alive. Sleeping, weak, but alive. Chris ran a caressing hand over the tousled chestnut hair, smiling to himself as he let his hands wander over the smooth skin on one cheek, coming to rest against one shoulder.
The smile faltered slightly as he remembered yesterday. He had nearly lost him. The killer had nearly gotten him -- again. Ezra had been close to death and only Vin and Buck's 'donation' had saved him. He was weak as a kitten, but he was still with him, Chris tried to calm his mind. Ezra was alive, in his arms, safe. He had beaten the odds again, but it had been the closest call yet.
I can't lose you now, Chris thought desperately, nuzzling the soft hair. Now that we have finally cleared the air, found each other.... I love you, Ezra. I need you.
The thought almost startled him as he realized what he was thinking. Yes, he really loved the man, with heart and soul and everything. And to hell with the rest of the world! Chris relaxed, still amazed about his own feelings.
Ezra moved faintly but didn't wake like he had throughout the night, confused and afraid. Chris sighed softly. He was alive, he told himself. Here, with him. The man he loved, who touched him like no one else had ever touched his soul -- who was a vampire. Chris couldn't care less. They had talked about it extensively and Larabee had found that he wasn't really as perturbed as he thought he would be. The lust and desire had made way to love and need, wanting the man in his life, whatever he was. He lived off blood, he couldn't go out throughout the day, he was stronger than average, but otherwise, Ezra Standish was very much human in Chris's eyes.
Running his fingers through the brown hair, Chris smiled when his lover instinctively turned his head into the caress. He kissed him softly, then carefully disentangled himself. Ezra moved again, but he didn't wake. Covering him with the blanket again, Chris then left to get himself breakfast.

*

Chris had just filled his first mug of coffee when the phone rang. He cursed softly and grabbed the offending cell, snapping it open.
"Larabee," he answered.
"Mr. Larabee, it's Franklin."
Surprise registered in him. He had called Franklin last night, before falling asleep with Ezra in his arms, but he had only been able to get the answering service.
"Mr. Franklin.... I take it you heard of the attack on Ezra yesterday."
"Yes, indeed. News travel fast in the community."
"Seems like it. I figured you might want to drop by and..."
"No."
"No?" Chris was slightly baffled. "I thought he was your son. Your first one. You were the one to explain the deep relationship between sire and child to us...."
A sigh. "Yes, I know, but I can't come back to Salt Lake City, Mr. Larabee. If I do, I'm dead."
"I don't understand...."
"Mr. Larabee, Ezra made it quite clear to me. It's his city. If he doesn't want me in it, I won't come. It would be like signing my own death certificate." Another sigh. "How is he?"
"Weak but alive. He's still sleeping." Chris was confused. Ezra had threatened Franklin and told him it was his city? Another piece of the puzzle that made up the man... He consisted of a lot of individual parts and none alone made sense. Together, Chris was seeing a vague image and he wondered if he was seeing it correctly. If he did.... whoa!
"From what I heard, he'll need a while to regenerate completely. Hawthorn is bad already, but exposing him to the sun on top of it would have killed him eventually."
Chris clenched his teeth, reminded of the barely alive man he had seen not so many hours before.
His lover.
"I take it he was fed?" Franklin interrupted the images.
"Yes. Do you want me to tell him something?"
"No."
Chris silently shook his head. "All right. Thanks for calling back."
As he closed the phone and threw it onto the table, he became aware of the audience he had had. Ezra was leaning against the frame of the door, wrapped in the old sweater and pants Vin had donated. He looked exhausted, paler than normal, not at all on top of the world.
"Good morning, Ezra," Chris greeted him with a smile.
"Who was that?" he asked.
Larabee shook his head. "Someone I called yesterday. Nothing important."
"Who?" Ezra demanded, his eyes flaring with fire for a moment.
Chris sighed. "Franklin."
The vampire's stance changed immediately and he could hear a low, warning growl from deep within his throat. "What did he want?" Ezra spat.
"Nothing. I called him, leaving a message. I thought he might want to know about the attack on you...."
Ezra pushed away from the door, suddenly very much alive and animated. "He better not show his face around here!" he hissed.
"Ezra..."
"Why did you call him!" he demanded furiously.
Chris frowned. "He is your sire..."
"He is nothing! Least of all my sire!" Ezra snarled. "We are not related in any way!"
"But you..."
Burning green eyes stared at the blond and Chris met the heated gaze, holding it. He wouldn't back down. "He. Is. Not. My. Sire!" Ezra's shoulders suddenly slumped and he swayed slightly. "He wasn't there.... he was never there.... because...." His voice trailed off.
Chris was at his side in a flash, ignoring the small voice of alarm, telling him that it might be dangerous to touch the agitated vampire. He wrapped his arms around the smaller figure.
"Because?" he prompted.
Ezra's arms came around Chris's waist and he buried his head in the dark shirt, exhaling softly. Larabee felt the tension in the compact frame, the minute tremors racing through the muscles. The dangerous man, the vampire, had made way for the fragile soul that was currently trying to regain its strength. It had made way for a man who needed his lover's reassurance
"Let's sit you down," he murmured and steered the unresisting form to the couch.
Ezra let him himself be pulled close, never losing contact with his lover, and Chris planted a reassuring kiss on the soft hair.
"It was an accident," the vampire murmured.
Larabee frowned but decided to listen, not ask. At least not yet.
"I shouldn't have been born," Ezra went on. "He killed me because he was hungry.... he was careless.. was shot... his blood got into my system..."
Oh gawd, Chris moaned silently. Franklin had never intended to have a child. Ezra had never had the choice like the others.
"I don't ever want to see him again," his lover went on, voice low but hard as steel. "He ruined my life!"
Chris rubbed a soothing hand over one arm. "Yeah," he murmured. "But he also enriched mine." He smiled. "I'd never have met you otherwise."
Ezra turned his head, managing a small smile.
"I know it's not much compared to what you went through," Chris continued.
He couldn't imagine what it would be like to die such a violent death, then be reborn. Ezra had lost his life, his family, his lover... everything. Because of a younger Franklin who had been too rash.
A pale finger on his lips stopped him. "It's more than I could ever have hoped for, Chris. A lot more. I just don't want to see this man ever again.... it hurts too much. He is not my sire and never was."
"That why you threatened him?"
Ezra hesitated. "He mentioned it?"
"He said you claimed Salt Lake is your city and he should never return. Territorial, hm?" The last was said with a smile in his voice.
Ezra was silent for a moment. "Yes and no," he finally answered. "It's my city, but vampires aren't territorial. Otherwise there'd only be one per town." He shrugged slightly.
"He took the threat quite seriously."
A rumbling growl. "He should!"
Chris soothed the tense man. "He does, Ezra, he does." You pull a lot of weight, lover. Why? "So, how do you feel?"
A sigh. "Weaker than I wish I would."
"Do you need more food?"
Ezra shook his head. "No. Maybe later. I'm fine right now."
Chris continued to caress the man in his arms, feeling warm inside and still a little amazed at the way it just felt - right..
"Chris?"
"Hm?"
"What happened?"
"You remember nothing?"
The vampire swallowed. Suddenly he tensed. "She was there."
Chris frowned. "Who?"
"When I was in the desert... I saw someone. It was a woman. She talked to me." He frowned, trying to remember the words his agonized mind had heard. "She called me... brother... talked about being an only child from now on."
Chris matched the frown. "A psychopathic vampire?"
Ezra slowly shook his head. "No. My sister."
"You have a sister?"
A smile. "Yes, by blood, in a way. Franklin's daughter."
Chris stiffened. "Alicia?"
"She never gave me her name, but I think I'll launch a little inquiry of my own. But not right now," he added softly. The frown was back.
"How did you find me?"
"Vin had a hunch. Millwood had apparently been killed at Dead Man's Gulch, so he figured it couldn't hurt to drop by and check if you might be there as well."
"Oh." Ezra was silent for a while. "I don't remember much after they dumped me."
"What's the last you remember?" Chris inquired gently.
Ezra sighed. "I remember enough to know that what was left of me could only be the monster... the killer... that I'd need warm, living blood to survive. What happened?"
Chris hesitated and the vampire frowned.
"Chris?"
"We fed you," Larabee answered slowly.
"Who?" Ezra knew that he must have fed off a warm body. Fear rose inside him. "Chris....?"
The blond man smiled slightly. "Not me," he reassured his lover. "Luther wouldn't let me."
"Luther?"
"He was here when Vin brought you in. As was Buck. He told us what you needed, that there was no time to lose... and Vin and Buck volunteered."
Ezra's face was completely blank for a moment, then fury raced across it like a thunderstorm. "What?" he hissed. "Luther let them?" He erupted from the couch, adrenaline coursing through him a second time. "How dare he!"
"Ezra, calm down. It was the only way. He wasn't happy about it, but we had no more time. You would have died."
"I could have killed them...you!"
"Luther was here to control it."
"Fuck him!" Ezra shouted. "He had no right...!"
Chris felt anger rise inside him and he met the burning eyes with a heated gaze of his own. "He had every right, Standish! You were dying, goddamnit! I would have given you blood if he would have let me!" He caught the smaller man's arm as Ezra turned away. "You are our friend!"
Ezra opened his mouth to say something, but Chris wouldn't let him.
"I love you, Ezra Standish!" he declared fervently. "I wouldn't let you die if there's be something I could do about it!"
Ezra stared at him, stunned, as he barely registered the words he had longed for, waited so desperately to hear, finally coming from Chris. But still .... "I could have killed any of you," he murmured.
"Luther was here to prevent that."
"But...."
Chris sighed and pulled the man closer to him, wrapping his arms around the smaller body. "Stop that," he ordered softly. "Everything's okay now."
Ezra buried himself into warm embrace, closing his eyes. He started to tremble slightly. Indeed it was.
"You want to go back to bed?"
"I'm rather comfortable where I am now," Ezra murmured, snuggling into his hold. "But if I have you in bed as well...?"
Now there was a blatant hint if he had ever heard one, Chris mused, grinning. "I thought you felt weak?"
"Weak compared to my normal condition. The vampire version of weak," came the sly answer.
Chris chuckled. Suddenly he saw a small frown on his lover's features. "Chris?" Ezra queried.
"Yes?"
"Talk to me."
Chris gave him a puzzled look. "Huh?"
"Something's still bothering you."
Larabee gazed into the emerald green eyes and something he had successfully pushed to the back of his mind rose again. The words had burned him.
"These guys that kidnapped you..." he started slowly.
"Yes?"
"What one of them said... about...."
"About you being my 'plaything'?"
A wordless nod.
Ezra sighed. "Listen, Chris, except for their different diet, humans and vampires aren't that much different. It's not uncommon with some of us to seek out pleasure wherever it can be found. Most certainly this man was one of that those. I'm not. I never played with anyone's affections, with love, with sex. You should know that by now. Besides," he smiled, "there's still that  irrelevant little fact that I love you."
"Yeah, completely irrelevant," Chris murmured and leaned forward and gently pressed his lips on the inviting ones of his lover, feeling them open under his careful teasing.
Ezra welcomed him into his mouth, their tongues dancing leisurely. The vampire wove his hands into Chris's hair and held him in place as he became more forceful, plundering the warmth, definitely wanting more. They came up for air, both breathing hard. Chris gazed down into the bright eyes, reading desire in them, need, and love.
"So you love me?" he murmured.
"Very much," Ezra breathed, slipping a hand under the loose shirt.
Chris smiled as the teasing fingers brushed over his skin. He descended onto the sinful mouth, claiming it, feeling Ezra push back. Fingers raked gently over his skin, pushing the shirt up, exposing his back and chest. The vampire rumbled softly as Larabee nibbled down his neck. Chris didn't do much more than kiss him, paying attention to the little spots that evoked a louder reaction than others. Ezra pushed up at him, wanting more body contact, his awakening arousal brushing against Chris's.
His lover smiled deviously, cupping the straining hardness, squeezing it. Ezra gasped, pushing harder, and Chris obligingly repeated the move.
"Chris!" he hissed. "Please!"
"Don't be so impatient," Larabee growled, lavishing some attention to the secret spot on Ezra's neck.
Standish tensed with the intense feeling, biting back a cry as Chris slid his hands into the sweat pants.
"Oh Lord," he breathed as talented fingers attacked him.
Chris maneuvered Ezra toward the couch and pushed the offending pants down shapely thighs. The sweater followed, leaving his lover naked. Ezra pushed his head back into the cushions, eyes closed, shivering as Chris left a trail of kisses and caresses down his chest and stomach, then returning to the hardening nubs. Strong hands gripped his head as Chris teased the nipples and Ezra's eyes glowed with pleasure.
"Chris, I want...."
"My treat," Larabee murmured, coming up to kiss the vampire. "You just relax and enjoy..."
"I'm no invalid," Ezra murmured, closing his eyes in bliss as a calloused hand stroked over his full length.
"Never said that...." Chris whispered.
"Won't break either."
He chuckled and gave the hardness a tug, making Ezra jump. "Who said you would? Just taking it slow." Chris nuzzled him. "We have time."
He dove into a long, hard kiss again, loving the feel of Ezra writhing against him, wrapping a leg around his, trying to get even closer. His resolve to only pleasure Ezra with his hands and lips was melting.
"You're not making this easy!" he protested weakly.
Ezra grinned devilishly. "Never said I would. Too many clothes," he added in a complaining voice.
Chris looked at the naked form, grinning. "Nope, not at all."
The vampire growled impatiently and tugged at Chris's shirt. Larabee laughed and complied before it would end up ripped to pieces. Ezra's fingers rubbed over his nipples and then tweaked them gently. Chris inhaled deeply, pulling away by force, noting the mischievous glint in the green eyes.
"Devil," he murmured.
Ezra's grin widened. "Stop me," he challenged. "You have the advantage... I'm weakened."
Chris laughed again. Even a weak Ezra, in his current state, was quite a match. He began his trail down south again, teasing his partner even more, ignoring the straining hardness. Ezra moaned impatiently once more, hands pushing Chris's head where he wanted him the most. He almost screamed when Larabee finally did what he had yearned for. Chris didn't leave it at one contact. He went down on him with abandon, his hands holding the muscular thighs, spreading Ezra's legs. The vampire cried out, wanting more, but Chris didn't give in to his desire to take his lover. Not today.
With a last howl, Ezra suddenly hit his climax. He fell back into the couch, breathing hard, looking flushed but pleased. Chris grinned at the sight, rubbing the tense upper legs. Ezra relaxed under the caress, moaning briefly as his lover bestowed a butterfly kiss on the fading arousal.
"You?" he asked weakly.
"Later," Chris promised. "You okay?"
"I told you, I won't break," came the growled answer.
"Just checking." Chris rose to kiss him.
Ezra inserted a knee between his legs, pushing up slightly, making Chris start.
"Hey," he protested.
"Later? Really?" Standish teased, voice throaty. Again, the knee moved.
Chris wanted to move away, but he found he couldn't. He came quickly as Ezra's hand closed around him, bringing him over the edge with a few expert strokes.
"Gawd," he murmured, breathing deeply. "That was not nice."
"Really?"
Chris briefly stuck out his tongue, making Ezra laugh.
"I think we need to clean up," Larabee sighed.
"Vin have a large shower?"
Chris pulled him up, into his arms, giving him a brief kiss. "How about we find out?"
"You up to it?" Ezra teased.
"That's something we'll find out as well," Chris murmured and walked on ahead, quite aware of two lust filled eyes following his every move. Damn if they wouldn't use their time alone to the fullest!

* * *

Ezra untangled himself from his sleeping lover, smiling at the man. Chris's hair was in wild disarray, and he looked completely at peace with himself, his features smooth and relaxed. Ezra couldn't but lean down and kiss his forehead, drawing a mumble from Larabee. His smile widened and his body tingled with the memory of making love in the shower. He couldn't forget the expression of intense pleasure on Chris's face as Ezra had touched him, explored and mapped his body, nor the cry of release when he had slipped his finger deep into him. As much as Ezra had wanted to take the man, he didn't think the shower was such a good place for their first time. And they had time. No need to rush. It was wonderful all on its own to simply hold Chris in his arms.
He slipped out of bed and walked into the living room, closing the door to the bedroom after himself. He grabbed his cell phone, checked the batteries, and made his first call. Ezra Standish had a business to run and things to take care of.
"Luther? Ezra.... Yes, I'm fine. Listen, I want you to spread a name and a description of a vampire. Whoever sees or hears anything, I want to know. If the vampire in question has fled town, contact the other communities. We have found the killer...."
 

Ezra returned to bed not much later, having done all there was to do. Wherever Alicia was, wherever she was hiding, she would be found sooner or later.
May the Lord have mercy on her soul, he thought wryly.
She wouldn't even have a trial. Those who murdered vampires out of cold blood, whether they were human or vampire as well, received little mercy.
Crawling under the cover with his lover, Ezra chased those thoughts away. The case was over. This, his relationship with Chris, his new life, his lover, had just begun. He settled back to watch the blond man, smiling to himself. What Chris had done for him, what Vin and Buck had done, it went past his rational thinking. They hadn't known him for more than a month, and they had willingly fed a starving vampire. And even before that, they had accepted him, not much fuss about it.
Chris.... he should have been repulsed, he should have been scared, he should have been.... a lot of things, but not laying in his bed right now, sleeping, having made love to Ezra in so many ways. He wasn't. He had come to accept the vampire, he had come to accept his love... Chris loved him.
Standish wondered what Josiah, his Josiah, would have made out of this. A soul reborn in another man? A closed circle? Destiny? The Fates? Ezra didn't know, but he felt content, more than he had ever felt since his rebirth. Right now, that was all that counted.

* * *

Buck came around slowly, wondering what it was that had woken him up. The moment he stirred he knew. It had been the soft breath of his lover at his neck, a warm hand slowly caressing his bare chest from behind.
"Vin?" Buck murmured lazily and stretched, snuggling closer into his lover's embrace.
"Hm..." Vin whispered and started nibbling at Buck's neck.
"What are you doing?"
Not that Buck had anything against Vin's actions, as his growing arousal let him know. But something like this had become rather rare lately, with Vin not being that much of a morning person and them living in a stable relationship for more than four years now, where sex was important but no the most important part. Not that they weren't waking up like this anymore, but...
"Vin..." Buck moaned as he was pulled out of his thoughts by a talented hand that was working its way down his stomach, and a growing hardness pushing at his backside.
"Yeah...?" was the breathless reply, the hand now closing around his member, thumb stroking the tip carefully.
Buck arched into the touch. "God, Tanner, stop teasing...," he managed hoarsely, raising his leg in a wordless invitation.
Which Vin took immediately. He didn’t need any preparations. Buck turned his head to claim Vin's mouth in a fierce kiss as he felt his lover's slow and deep thrusts, matching the strokes of his hand. He slid his hand into Vin's hair and pulled him closer, shudders running through his body as Vin's strokes became fiercer. Tanner took his time, but it didn’t mean the experience was any less intense. Completely the opposite… it was incredible.
His cry was swallowed in his lover's mouth as they both reached completion.
"What the hell was that?" Buck breathed when he was able to speak again.
"Don't tell me you need an explanation, Bucklin," Vin grinned. "You know, when there are two people who really, really like one another...."
"Tan-ner... "
"That's my name."
"I didn't mean that, and you know that very well. Not that I mind, but ... uhm, actually you're not the passion-in-the-early-morning type. ‘Specially after these encounters of last night...." Buck trailed off.
"Hm-hm. Glad you don't mind…" Vin breathed.
"No, really. What happened to us?"
"Wanna repeat the experience?"
"Hm...." Buck made thoughtfully, not ready to jump into this with both feet.
"Think it might have something to do with Ezra?" Vin pushed himself up on one elbow.
"Ezra?!"
"It started after... well, you know.” Vin gave a half-shrug. “And you have to admit 'donating' blood to Ezra had something. Never felt anything like it."
"Me neither. But if it has this effect on you, I won't let Ezra bite you again. Especially when it has that effect on you!"
Vin smiled widely. "You weren't that uneffected either ..."
"Hm ... let's just have a talk to Ezra... long talk."

* * *

Chris moaned softly as he stretched, feeling a slight twinge from areas that had seen quite some activity in the last hours. But he felt good, very, very good. Arms came around his waist and he turned into the embrace, smiling at the relaxed expression in Ezra's face. The vampire ran one hand over his side, not trying to arouse, just caressing the warm skin. Chris kissed him.
"Need to check back with the others."
Ezra made a soft noise of agreement, but he didn't let go.
"Not going anywhere," Chris promised.
"Hope so," was the throaty reply.
He chuckled. For the last day, they had explored each other, made love, talked, and simply been together. A kind of balance had been established and Chris found that while he found contact with Ezra was still electric, he no longer reacted like a hormone-driven teenager. Ezra was his lover and he found him very much attractive, but it didn't result in the very embarrassing display of before.
"At least not till tomorrow," Chris added. "Travis expects us for a de-briefing."
Ezra still ran his hands across his skin. "I know. I have some business to take care of as well." He nibbled at Chris's collar bone. "But not right now."
"You're gonna be the death of me," Larabee sighed.
Ezra chuckled. "Didn't hear you complaining..."
Oh no, he hadn't complained. Far from it. Chris had screamed out his climax, feeling Ezra deep inside him. It had been a fulfilling experience, something incredibly satisfying.
"Let me call the others," he mumbled.
"Don't you think they know?" Ezra asked, nibbling his way down to one nipple.
Chris hissed softly. "Ez-ra!"
"Yes?" The vampire's eyes twinkled with mischief.
Larabee let himself sink into the pillows in surrender. To hell with it. Vin and Buck were aware of the situation, he knew. Let them handle it!

* * *

Assistant Director Travis looked from one man to the other, noting the relaxed stance in Chris, the small smile playing around Ezra's lips and eyes, and he had to bite down on his own smile. Compared to the spit and vinegar behavior from not so long ago, the two men were suddenly completely amiable. Something had happened throughout the team's latest case, and in Travis's eyes it had been something positive.
"So this is the final version of the report?" he asked rhetorically.
Chris nodded. "Yes, sir."
"A psychopath who killed himself in the end. With a token body to show."
What else had he expected? He knew the truth, but that could never be printed on paper or filed. Vampires didn't officially exist.
"Do I want to know what happened to her?" he wanted to know, looking at Ezra.
The vampire smiled slightly. "No, Orrin, not really. The community has ways to... deal with murderers."
Travis nodded. "At least it's over."
"Completely."
"Good. Chris, you and your team have the rest of the week off. I don't want to see your sorry butts in here till Monday morning."
"Thank you, sir."
Larabee's men had done a lot more than expected, taking over not only CSI but also police work in guarding Ezra for so long. They needed a breather and Travis was very much ready to give it to them.
He watched the two so different men leave, wondering what it was that was nagging him about them. Yes, something had changed, something fundamental, but he couldn't put his finger on it.
 

"Four days off, hm?" Ezra chuckled. "I don't have to call a moving company then."
Chris snorted. "I'm not lugging your stuff around, Standish."
Ezra pushed him against the elevator wall, pressing his body against the slender form. "Not even for a handsome bonus?"
Chris grabbed the smaller man, whirled them around, and claimed his lips in a short, hard kiss that left Ezra slightly dazed. Lord, beware of an unleashed Larabee, he thought fuzzily.
"Got my bonus already," Chris's voice whispered roughly in his ear.
He released him as they arrived downstairs and walked out of the elevator, shooting Ezra a taunting smile. The vampire pulled himself together, trying not to look at the sinfully tight jeans. Damn the man!
"You're easy to satisfy," he teased as they stepped out onto the dark streets.
Chris raised his eyebrows. "There would be more?"
"A lot more."
"Hm, then I might just consider carrying in your potted plants."
"That wouldn't even get you what you just had in the elevator," Ezra shot back, playing along.
"And if I put up Shawn's scratching tree?"
"She doesn't have one."
Chris snickered. "She does. Vin bought her one, remember?"
Ezra rolled his eyes. "I won't take it along!"
"It'll break her heart."
He groaned and slid into the passenger seat of Chris's car. "You all spoiled that cat!"
Larabee leaned over and caught Ezra's chin with one hand, brushing a butterfly kiss over his. "I also like to spoil the owner," he breathed.
"The owner would appreciate it," Ezra whispered against the tantalizing lips.
Chris grinned and let go of him, starting the car. "Where to?"
The vampire was silent for a moment, then he said calmly, "The old place. I want to pick something up."
Chris didn't argue. He simply slid the car into gear and merged into the evening traffic, heading for the townhouse.

* * *

Ezra stood in front of the burned out remains of his townhouse, green eyes gazing up and down the derelict looking structure. It looked like a gutted animal; a barbecued animal, he sighed. The first explosion had ripped a hole into the wall, which had then started to cave in when the firefighters had tried to get control of the flames. The fire had eaten along the electrical cables and through the floor, destroying most of the rooms above the initial attack. The glass windows had burst, either under the heat or when the firemen had broken them to get to the source of the fires. What the fire hadn't destroyed, the extinguisher foam and water had damaged.
"Total loss," he sighed.
Chris was beside him, looking past the yellow 'no trespassing' lines, shaking his head sadly. "Yep. The team removed everything that wasn't a complete loss or looked like it might be repairable. We stored it in a warehouse."
"Thanks."
Ezra walked past the police tape and carefully entered the ruin. Chris followed. They had permission to enter the crime scene, especially since it had been downgraded from crime scene to a simple 'dangerous ruin'. While Chris had no intention to end up falling through the floor, he trusted his own instincts and Ezra enough to prevent that. Larabee carried a flashlight with him. While Ezra was perfectly capable of seeing in the dark, Chris had his problems. The light from the street lamps helped little. Any sane person would have waited till morning, but Chris had never believed himself to be completely sane, and then there was the little problem of Ezra Standish and sun light.
They went past the burned out living room into the small office room that Chris had never seen from the inside. Here, the fire hadn't damaged more than the floor and left traces of black soot on the walls and ceiling. The water had done the rest. The wooden furniture that hadn't gone up in flames was waterlogged and beyond restoration. Chris saw the melted remains of a computer.
Ezra walked over to a heavy trunk and opened it easily. While the wood looked charred, the inside of the trunk had survived the fire and water attack. Chris watched his lover rummage through the contents, then he straightened and held a thick, leather folder in his hands. A relieved expression was on the pale features. Ezra opened the folder and leaved through the contents. Most of it was safely ensconced in plastic wrappings. In the semi-darkness of the room, Chris couldn't make out much. Ezra's fingers ran reverently down one of the plastic wrappings.
"Ezra?" Chris questioned softly.
"No damage," the vampire murmured.
The blond walked over and, keeping the light from shining directly onto the folder, he peered at the apparently precious contents. He was surprised to see that it was a copy of a dime store novel. A very old copy, looking yellowed with time, the cover hand-drawn, in black and white. The drawing was of seven men, on horses, and the title read 'The Magnificent Seven'. Chris felt his eyebrows rise.
"A little memento," Ezra murmured, gazing at the cover, smiling.
"A dime store novel?"
"Yes. A very special one. I'll have to tell you about Jock Steel one day." Ezra flipped the preserved novel around and behind it was another very old piece of paper.
"A deed?"
He nodded. "Sadly, not from my first business venture I made. The Standish Tavern was in my ownership for only a few days. It's another story. This one.... was the first attempt to settle down, get a grip on my new life."
"The 'Four Corners'?" Chris grinned.
Ezra chuckled. "I founded it after I left the reservation. It's still there, running under a new management. I'm simply a silent partner." He flashed Chris a grin.
Larabee had to laugh. "Anything else you want to get from here?"
Ezra reached into the trunk again and picked up a flat, long box. "Only this."
Chris curiously watched him open it. It contained a playing card set, equally old, and a small gun. A derringer.
"Mementos?" he hazarded a guess.
"Yes. The only ones I really keep. The novel, the deed, the cards and the derringer. And the picture." For a second Ezra seemed far away.
Chris wrapped an arm around the smaller man's shoulder and squeezed them gently. Ezra exhaled explosively.
"The past is the past and nothing can bring it back," he said levelly.
Chris pressed a kiss to one temple. "Yeah, but it's part of you."
Ezra briefly leaned into him, then stowed the box and the folder in the small backpack he had brought along. He looked around the house, smiling ruefully.
"Let's go."
They left the ruin, Chris watching his partner closely, but Ezra seemed okay. Then again, the vampire was not always what he seemed. He'd have to wait and see.
"Where to?" he wanted to know.
Standish grinned. "Your place or mine?"
"Your 'place' is an empty house, Ez."
"So it's yours?"
Chris chuckled. "Definitely."
They got into the car and Chris pulled away from the curb.
"Stop by at the Grotto," Ezra said as they drove down the almost empty street. "I have to take care of some business, then those four days are ours."
Chris only nodded.

* * *

Ezra walked into the Grotto, taking note of everyone present as he made his way to the office. Chris followed him like a silent shadow. The vampire smiled to himself. Both of them still radiated the other's scent, the pheromones, but Chris wasn't actually ashamed of it. Eyes followed the blond. Chris let them glance off him, his self-conscious behavior from before gone. They stepped into the office and Chris closed the door.
"Luther," Ezra greeted the only other occupant of the spacious room.
Luther, who had been working on the computer, nodded at his boss. Two pairs of different eyes met and Ezra waited for the younger vampire to react to the silent challenge. He couldn't let what his friend had done go uncommented. Luther had risked everything, the lives of Vin, Buck and even Chris, in his attempt to help Ezra. While part of Standish appreciated the effort, another part was screaming mad. Ezra avoided human blood like the plague. He had only tasted it once, the very first time he had had to feed, and he had killed in the process. For over a century he had lived off animal sustenance. Now he had taken from a human again.
"Ezra," Luther replied calmly, not rising to the challenge.
Ezra smiled to himself. He and Luther went back some time. The younger vampire had lost his sire shortly after his rebirth and he would have perished if Ezra hadn't taken the sire's place. It had been an instinctive decision on Standish's part. He hadn't wanted Luther to go through the same he had had to suffer; and maybe die in the process. They shared a sire-child relationship, but it hadn't been forged by blood and Ezra was reluctant to see a child in Luther. A protégé, yes. A child, no.
Now Luther, who knew him better than anyone, had gone up against a fundamental rule. Ezra wouldn't let it drop.
"It's good to see you again," the dark-skinned man now said. "I take it you have recovered completely." His eyes fell on Chris and a small smile twitched at the corners of his lips. "Both of you."
Ezra refused to be baited into changing the topic. "Why did you do it?" he asked, voice deceptively calm.
"It was the only way."
"You know the rules. You know me. And still you went and allowed two humans to feed me."
Luther nodded. "Because it was the only way. You would have died."
"I could have killed them, Luther." There was no heat in his voice, but it was still sharp as a blade.
"It was the only way," Luther repeated himself once again. "Other sustenance would have taken too long to arrive."
"Then you should have accepted the inevitable."
Ezra felt Chris tense behind him. A momentary regret flashed through him, then he concentrated on Luther again.
"I can't."
"Why?"
"Because you had a chance to survive."
Ezra's eyes hardened. "You would have sacrificed Vin, Buck and Chris for that?" he asked icily.
Chris's hand touched him and while part of him wanted to step away from his lover, detach himself, another part drew a strange kind of strength and calm from the touch.
"Ezra, nothing happened," Chris said softly.
"Keep out of this, Chris," Ezra heard himself snap. "You have no idea what could have happened!"
Chris didn't flinch back, but his eyes hardened as well, meeting the flaring green fire in the vampire's eyes.
"I could have easily torn out of Luther's grasp! I could have killed you before you even had had time to scream! What you saw was the monster in me and this monster knows no mercy, only the hunger!"
"We did what was necessary," Chris replied firmly. "I told you I'd do it again in a heartbeat."
"Ezra, it was the only way," Luther said once more. "I couldn't let you die."
Ezra looked at his protégé. For a while there was silence, their eyes locked, Ezra reasserting his position. He wordlessly let Luther know what he could do, and Luther accepted it without hesitation.
"Don't ever let it happen again," he only said and turned.
Ezra was aware of Chris and Luther exchanging a brief look, of Luther smiling, then the door closed after Larabee. The vampire led the way to one of the private, semi-circular booths.
"He isn't to blame," Chris argued, apparently feeling he had to defend Luther's actions. "He did what he felt right. We all did. You can't take your anger out on him."
"Who said I am?"
Chris frowned.
"Chris, if I had been angry... truly angry, he'd literally be a head shorter."
The frown deepened and the hazel eyes darkened. That was the moment their drinks were delivered.
"Ezra?" Chris asked calmly after the waiter was gone again.
"You don't understand."
"No. So tell me. It's not just that Luther let this happen, right?"
He sighed. "No."
Chris waited.
"I vowed never to drink human blood again, Chris. Not because of the taste." Ezra looked at his folded hands, then met Chris's eyes. "My first victim died because I couldn't control myself. After that I only took from animals, never killing one. When I finally met more of my kind, when I had learned to control the monster, I found out about the effect a feeding has on a human. We call it the hunting mode. We can lure our victim to us, make the feeding a highly erotic experience.... and even without a conscious thought, the feeding triggers the victim's sexual hunger. Vin and Buck.... they were horny like teenagers after the feeding." Ezra gave Chris a wry smile. "And I hadn't even tried to lure them into this sense of bliss."
"Okay, so you give because you take...." Larabee said slowly. "And that is bad because...?"
Another sigh. "Because humans can become addicted to it. There are vampire brothels, but they have little to do with sex. The vampires there feed off the humans who comes to them, giving them this bliss, and it is like a drug for some. They come back again and again, wanting more. Without the feeding, the bliss, they fail to have erotic experiences at all. Normal stimulation doesn't do it any more."
"So you were afraid Vin and Buck might become addicted to...you?"
Ezra nodded slowly. "It doesn't happen to everyone, nor does it happen after only a few feedings, but those who have their dosage on a regular basis... they are little more than drug addicts, waiting for their next fix."
Chris slowly understood and there was a thoughtful expression in his eyes. "That's why Luther wouldn't let me help?"
"No. One feeding doesn't do that. He wouldn't let you because...." Ezra stopped and sighed. "I didn't want you to feel aroused because of the feeding. I wanted you to come to me on your own, free will. I wanted my touch to be the reason, my presence, not the hunger...."
More understanding dawned in Chris's eyes. "Oh."
“I explained it to Vin and Buck as well. I think they understood.” Ezra gave him a small smile. "I also don't want you to believe that I think of you, or anyone else, as a personal blood bank, Chris. You probably know by now that we don't have the fangs the movie industry gave us."
He nodded. "I never thought that, Ezra." A sly smile crossed his lips. "And you managed to addict me to you without that, too."
Ezra met the mischievously twinkling eyes and felt a smile blossom. "Oh?"
"Yep."
"How does it feel?" he teased.
Chris leaned forward. "You feel good," he whispered throatily.
Ezra's smile widened, the dimples deepening. "Oh, really?"
"Really."
"Good," he murmured. "Because you feel perfect as well to me."
Heated eyes met.
"My place," Chris told him softly.
Ezra didn't need another invitation. "Your place," he confirmed.
Chris didn't give a damn who smelled what on him as they left the Grotto.

* * *

It was early afternoon and the buildings around the small townhouse cast long shadows across the almost deserted, quiet street. A U-Haul truck just pulled away from the curb, followed by Josiah’s car. Ezra’s move had gone flawlessly and JD had decided to take back the rental truck before they were charged for another day. Buck and the others had left not much earlier, when all the stuff had been carried inside, and when it had become apparent that until the new furniture was delivered, there was nothing else they could do. Little of Ezra’s belongings had survived the fire. A small truck had been more than sufficient to move it all.
About thirty minutes later a car stopped in front of the townhouse and the driver got out, taking off her sunglasses and looking at the neat little building with its tiny front yard. The woman walked up the paved way leading to the wide open door. From the inside, noises could be heard. Someone was moving about.
She knocked against the door.
“Hello?”
Ezra walked out of the living room, which was currently nothing but an empty room with a few moving boxes in it. He had dressed in a pair of old jeans and a t-shirt, looking a bit disheveled.
“Can I help you, Ma’am?” he asked politely, his eyes running over the woman.
She was about his size, with sun-bleached, blonde hair. While he suspected that she was a natural blonde, the coloring seemed to be slightly enhanced by artificial means. Brown eyes took in the empty house. She was dressed casually.
“I was told that I could find a Mr. Chris Larabee here?”
“Yes, he is. He’s currently upstairs.” Ezra gestured vaguely toward the stairs. “Bathroom.”
“Oh.”
“And you are?” he inquired.
“My name is Jo-Ann Larabee. His wife.”
 

to be continued in Endymion